Friday, June 20, 2003

Last night I was at the Comedy Central Roast for Denis Leary. Now I know you think this is the Friar's Club Roast like they have done in the past but you are wrong...Comedy Central is trying to revive the old Dean Martin style of roasts he did a while back and well...let's just say if they are anything like the one last night they will not last long.

It was one huge penis joke all night like. Penis and testicles were the theme of the evening. Penis, testicles, and gay jokes. Rene Russo sporting a strap on dildo in a video clip. And yes...they showed the penis (which made me jealous it was so big...)...Joe Mantegna comparing Denis' career or the age of it or something to Shannen Doherty's "twat" (and yes, he said "twat"). Overall Mario Cantone, Dr. Dre, and Ed Lover had the best bits with the best clip coming from Gilbert Gottfried who voiced Denis' dog. Best line of the night: "You're Irish. Why are we roasting you? Shouldn't you be boiled?"

And something the people at Gawker will like to know about -- trucker hats were on display. There were at least two male models (I'll explain why models were there in a moment) who were wearing trucker hats with the mesh backing on them. Of course I thought of the people at Gawker when I saw them. The "set dressing" included models who were hired just to sit on stage and look pretty. Well first according to my sources they overbooked the number of models and some didn't get to be on stage and were rather pissed about it. They were offered to be seat fillers but some people weren't too keen on it since if they did get to sit down they might not get back up when the people who had claim to the seats returned. After the show they were pissed that the production staff wasn't going to be able to get them into the party. One of them, I swear was wearing a denim skirt so short it was a belt.

Also on the dais were members of the cast of the Sopranos. Of course they've already been killed off of the show by now but since their only claim to fame is the Sopranos they are riding that horse as hard as they can...and while I'm at it...apparently the NYC smoking ban didn't apply to this show since more than one person was smoking quite liberally on stage...even Gina Gershon (who should never ever sing again) made a comment about shoving Denis up Bloomberg's ass (or something like that)....

Overall...I have no idea how they are going to air this show. It's going to be something along the lines of this...."Good evening! (insert world's longst bleep out sequence here where only every fifteenth word is heard). GOOD NIGHT!!!"

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