Friday, February 28, 2003

Can someone please tell me the exact moment when you go from noticing a person to outright ogling and undressing them with your mind?

Last night the rugby team had a workout at the Printing House gym (our practice pitch still frozen over) and then some of us went to the Cowgirl Hall of Fame for a late dinner (being that it was 9:00 or so). Being that I am watching my diet so as not to wind up like my father (stroke, heart attack, triple bypass surgery, adult diabetes -- aka diabetes 2 -- and on meds unlike me who has D2 and is not on meds because I watch my diet and exercise up a storm), I had the nice grilled vegetable salad and unsweetened tea and it was quite filling and nice and all that fun stuff.

But anyway, this is all about ogling right? Our waiter was this little hottie that I noticed when I first got there. Now mind you, I acknowledged the fact that he was hot and had a great body but that was about it. However, when I saw the butt that's when I was in heaven. The man had an ass that could eat dinner off of (and we all know what an ass man I am) and well that just sent me off on a wild storm of cruising him every time he walked by whether he knew it or not or was interested or not. Frankly I didn't care because I had a nice view all the way around.

Maybe that line for me is if they have a nice ass...maybe I just answered my own question.

Okay ignore this entry. Back to your regularly scheduled program.
From the lovely Akasha

The haxor handle of Brian the 646 guy is "Po1son S3r1ous".

What's yours? Enter your name:


Gee...this result will make my Mom happy....


I am the number
666
I am evil

_

what number are you?

this quiz by orsa

Quick! Where do you go to download music online for free (and the good stuff not the stuff that you can only find on MP3.com because they band hasn't signed a contract with a major label)...I have WinMX, Kazaa, and Morpheus (I'm sure there's some hidden charges I haven't learned about yet).

Go! Work! Produce! Tell!

I'm also wondering if this guy's segment on Strictly Personal ran last night. I thought it was him and I have to admit that show cracks me up. VirtualVicki arabesque-ing on rollerblades was a hoot....now if it wasn't him, then the guy it actually was is just as adorable...

Update: It indeed was Alex on Strictly Personal last night. Alex...take this as it is (which would be a total compliment)...if you were gay, I would so be into you...sadly that heterosexual man thing is a total turn off for me...then again if we were dating, we couldn't have the potatoes or chicken fried steak...well maybe once a week on the one bad day a week I allow myself...and I have a loft bed as well so I don't know how you feel about heights and so forth...so here is his ad and you had better work fast because someone is going to snatch him up and be one lucky woman...dammit...hee!

Of course I'm feeling really stupid because I read his blog and somehow managed to miss that important tidbit of info that his episode had aired and pretty much feel like I've just mad an ass of myself.
Quote of the Day

If you do get into a car, what ever you do, don't take that seat belt off even for a second, since that is when the car crashes.

If you do get in a car, don't get into arguments. The car crashes.

If you do get in a car, don't drive during storms. The car crashes.

If you do get in a car, don't be pregnant. The car crashes.

If you do get in a car, don't go near cliffs. The car falls off.

If you do get in a car, don't drink. The car crashes.


-- taken from Things We Learn From Watching Soap Operas

Thursday, February 27, 2003

In memory and honor of Fred Rogers who was my first real "friend" right after Big Bird, I'm not going to post anything else today. We should all take a moment as he requested when he received his lifetime achievement award at the Daytime Emmys to reflect on those that made a difference in our lives growing up -- the teachers, the parents, the neighbors.



Quote of the Day

Won't you be my neighbor? -- Fred Rogers of Mr. Rogers Neighborhood, who passed away earlier this morning.

Wednesday, February 26, 2003

Wheeee! Queer as Folk AND Six Feet Under start Season 3 on Sunday! *HAPPY DANCE!*

My TV viewing will now increase quite a bit.
Quick! I need the name of a tattoo artist/parlor that does good work at a good price.

You have a mission. Go! Produce!
I had a dream about the Wonder Twink last night (and for the record, it was a dream, not a daydream, and I was fully clothed so get your minds out of the gutter). The dream had us a team workout at the gym and he and I were talking when he had the urge to readjust his...um...manhood in his shorts.

For some reason he felt the urge to yank down the front of his pants and sure enough his semi-hard cock was staring me in the face. He quickly tucked it back into his jock, got this cute, embarrassed look on his face and then off he went.

That was my dream. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Quote of the Day

Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth. -- Fran Lebowitz

Tuesday, February 25, 2003

A couple of quick notes from tonight's rugby practice and yes we did practice in the cold...in a parking lot...on the concrete...and yes I fell down and was thankful to be wearing my warm up pants. Coach was pleased to see my post-season progress in terms of weight loss and muscle gain. Even one of the assistant coaches was gushing. Made me feel good to know that all of my hard work was paying off. We did some passing drills and I wasn't as winded as I used to be...cardio is paying off big time. I need to work on hand position for prepping for catches and things like that. I missed two passes in a row (including the one that I fell on) and when Coach asked how many passes were dropped, I admitted to my two (although there were more) and Coach said, "Just two. And they were all Brian's." Sigh. This is going to be a fun season (and no, there is no sarcasm in that comment).

In other news, the really, really, really, really hot guy on the team -- I got to massage him at our post practice drink up. And damn did those muscles felt good under my hands. Now if I can just get him out of his clothes somehow. It was odd too because for the entire fall season I was pretty much...well dare I use the word ignored....but it fits....anyway, I was pretty much ignored with him and when we had to partner up, he immediately put his arm around me. He can do that anytime. Personally, I wanted to melt.

I also got to shove a dollar bill down the pants of one of our backs and let's just say given the chance I'll do it again. It was at that moment that I realized how much of a flirt I really am. Shocking, I know, but this was true proof. More than my overwhelming need to massage the better looking half of the Wonder Twink duo whenever I see him (and he did give me a hug at practice tonight after the dropped pass comment by Coach...that made me happy).

And on a side note...I still need an event space for our bachelor auction here in NYC. C'mon people? Any ideas? Anything. Bueller?
Happy dance for me!

I just got called down to the bigwig's office and I knew he was calling a few people down already from my department and I had no idea why. Well, I knew they were doing layoffs and such in the company so I have been expecting the axe for a while. Down I went to his office and he passed a sheet of paper over to which said...

I'm getting a bonus this year.

SHOCK! I haven't had a bonus since I left Merrill Lynch back in 1996. I have no idea what to do with the money. Maybe a trip to San Fran will be in store for me. :)

Oooh...Or a new computer!
Okay....this story about masturbation made me crack up and spew water on my computer monitor at work. Sigh...he's getting a link....

Anyway he talks about in another post about how much he hates the small Asian women who seem to push their way to the front of the train car doors so they can get on first. Having been a victim of this myself, I thought I would share my story of a little Asian woman who decided to run through the train doors as they were closing and slam into me. Stop me if you've heard this one before.

This was when I was working on a project at Bear Stearns and living in Astoria. I would take the N train to 59th Street and transfer to a 4/5 express train to Grand Central and walk to work from there. Well one day the trains were running behind and we were holed up at the 59th Street stop while trains in front of us went through GCS, etc etc. I was talking with this very nice (and quite large) black woman about the trains and how you never seem to get where you need to be on time when you're in a hurry, etc etc when the bell sounded announcing that the doors were about to close.

At this precise moment of the door closing, this small Asian woman decides to go through the closing doors as hard as she can and slam right into me. She didn't offer an apology or anything. I was almost thrown into the nice black woman I was talking to before because I wasn't prepared to get tackled on the train. This set the black woman off. The following exchange ensued.

Black woman: "Excuse me. You should apologize to him."

Asian woman: No response. Shocked look on her face.

Black woman: "Yes. I'm talking to you. I've seen you on this train for at least the last six years and you keep pulling the same shit of running into the train at the last possible second and knocking people over."

Asian woman: No reponse. Still shocked look.

Black woman: "Don't try that no-speak-a English thing on me. I know you speak English very well because I've seen it. You should apologize."

Asian woman: Still shocked.

Mind you now, she's not being quiet in her argument with this Asian woman. Everyone in my car is staring at us and I'm kinda going, "Oh shit, someone is going to pull a blade and I'm going to die." Now, the train has not moved and the train doors are still opening and closing because of the freaks who are holding the doors open. So when the doors opened one last time, the black woman turned and pushed the Asian woman out of the car to the cheers, applause, and laughter, of the train car.

My response consisted of me turning to her, jaw on the subway car floor, and saying, "You're my new hero."

Sigh...I love that moment of my life.
So I’ve been watching I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Outta Here! and can I say what a bunch of fucking whiners these people are!

Every other episode, Melissa Rivers and Robin Leach are threatening to quit. They are just too pampered I think and Robin has threatened to go on a hunger strike until all of his demands are met. Personally, I think they just can’t hack it and when you get people who are on shows like Survivor who have gone through similar if not worse conditions than what they have, it makes them just seem a little petty. To make matters worse, even when all of their demands are met and they are given the assistance they need or are told that something is being done to make their lives better, they…well, Robin and Tyson mainly, aren’t happy about it and want more. Then they say that unless they drew a line in the sand that nothing would have been done but they aren’t happy with what WAS done. I mean really people. You are acting like prima donna babies.

Downtown Julie Brown – Hate her. Want her to die. Want her head on a stick and mounted outside my door.

Robin Leach – When he goes topless I want to vomit. He’s annoying and grating and pretty fucking demanding for a man who does absolutely nothing else but bitch and moan.

Tyson Beckford – Acting like a child. Whine, whine, whine.

You know what ticks me off is that they knew they were going to a rainforest and yet they are complaining about the rain – something the producers cannot control. Get over it people. If you can’t hack it then you shouldn’t have signed up for it. You could have said no.

Bravo to Stuttering John, Alana Stewart, Bruce Jenner, Cris Judd, and Maria Conchita Alonso who all have said they are sticking through every single bit of it because it’s for charity for Christ’s sake! If they were playing for themselves, they would have sucked it up and done it.

They just piss me off and I hope some of them do walk off so they can be ridiculed by America for being such babies!
Quote of the Day

If you cannot read this, please ask the flight attendant for assistance. -- United Airlines Flight Safety Brochure

Monday, February 24, 2003

I recently learned that Michael Jackson named one of his kids Blanket. Hmmm...guess who is gonna get his ass kicked at school (even if he's home-schooled)? I mean the best nickname this kid can ever have is Binky or Banky...or some derivation thereof. But Blanket. I mean really now.
I had a friend do an astrological chart on me and the potential for my move to San Francisco. If someone can help translate this, it would be appreciated.

Well, for Libras in general (this means looking at your Solar chart), Venus is lighting up your fourth house of home and family, meaning you're putting some artistic, beautifying focus there. More importantly, though, in your natal chart (where you are Cancer Rising, like myself--oooh! and thus have your Pisces Jupiter in Jup's own 9th house like me! Love you!), Uranus and the Sun are transiting together through the 9th house of "foreign" lands, other cultures, and travel. You are ready to get the hell out of Dodge. ;)

By mid-March, as planets continue to scroll through Pisces, and then later in the month when they shift to Aries, you'll find your 10th house of career and public life lighting up. Progress and power for you, my friend! As I mentioned on HoE, Saturn has gone direct, so we can all start moving forward w/ plans, and by June, Saturn will have moved from Gem to Cancer. This is HUGE for us latter-half 1974 babies. We are about to experience our SATURN RETURN.

Susan went to New Zealand; Shell left her husband and moved to Portland; Mike proposed to Ptero. Big life changes, big shifts in outlook and goals, reassessments of all we have done and where we are going. So, in short, none of your plans are shocking, astrologically.

;)
Monday Meltdown

Psycho coworker who was out all last week is in today. She hasn’t said a word to me. I think she knows how pissed I am.

Came into work to find nasty email from supervisor who said that I don’t focus enough on the accuracy of my work and hopes its just because I was running around like a lunatic the past week when psycho coworker was out and I was doing her job on top of the other two I already agreed to do.

How long can it take the New York Philharmonic to practice two pieces for the Grammys? A lot longer than you think.

So the verdict is in on the Michael Kanteres transsexual custody issue. The judge sided with Margo/Michael (aka the transsexual) and awarded him custody. The wife, the judge said, is to blame for a lot of shit. Talk about major precedent.

I learned this weekend that Gary Coleman is a virgin. Now that is something I did not need to know. I also learned that porn star Ron Jeremy is a lot smarter than he looks.

I was talking with a friend this weekend about the situation with me and California. Her take on it – I could have a lot of “Goodbye” sex. God, I love her for saying that.

Norah Jones. I adore her. Love her album. Sad to see Bruce Springsteen shafted for Album of the Year but I think we all knew Norah was getting it.

How spooky is it that the guy who as with Michael Kamen (my person I was working with at the Grammys) started singing “San Francisco” as we were heading to the elevator?

Is it just me or has Bruce Jenner either really not aged well or had a botched face lift done or something equally heinous?

And on the flip side of that, is it just me or as Melissa Rivers had plastic surgery done to look more like her mother, the Tupperware dish?

The really, really guy on the team (not the better looking half of the Wonder Twink Duo), the one that practically any of us would do in a heart beat, actually said that he didn’t recognize me at one of our team gym workouts because I had slimmed down so much. Hey, at least he noticed.

Can ABC milk this Bachelor/Bachelorette cash cow anymore? First there was the Aaron and Helene Tell All special and now the Trista and Ryan look back on their relationship from start to finish special. The horse is on the ground. It’s dead. Why are we beating it?

Trying to find a place to hold this bachelor auction (ideally a bar) is about as easy as me having sex with a woman.

I’m starting to believe more and more in serendipity.
Quote of the Day

Well just fuck me with a wire brush then! -- Comment overheard on subway from supposed high class Upper West Side matron who as definitely wearing knock off designer clothing.

Friday, February 21, 2003

And it's time for a quick check of the news...

I thought this law was stupid when I heard it and I do find it interesting that the attorney general's office in Florida isn't even going to be there to defend it. Well...when you pass a stupid fucked up law like that what do you expect?

And if I was this couple, I would be pretty damn mad as well. Of course after the first time I would make sure I was doing some especially kinky for her subsequent visits. Maybe the maid wanted to join in?

Geez. I'm sure someone will say that this was the result of terrorism. I could sneeze and they would say that terrorism was to blame.

But will they provide classes to help them learn the subject properly? And not just women on men either....I want all varieties... :)

This is becoming more and more like Baskin and Robbins 31 flavors. How many more are going to turn up now?

If KITT was there, he never would have allowed it to happen.

This man is an ass.

Quote of the Day

Eartha Kitt sounds like a cat in heat. -- Ethel Merman, who sounds like...well alien comes to mind.

Thursday, February 20, 2003

I feel like ripping off all of my clothes and run through Central Park screaming, "Viva La France! Viva La France!"

Don't ask me why. I just do.
Do you believe in signs? I'm not talking about Stop, Yield, You Must Be This Tall To Ride This Ride kinda signs. I mean those mystical, I was meant to see this, kinda signs.

I believe in signs. And to top it all off, this nagging little voice inside of me is saying, "Hey is that a sign? This could be a sign. Hoo boy, signs, signs everywhere are signs."

As I mentioned before, I have been offered a job in San Francisco and I am giving it some serious consideration despite the fact that I have said on numerous occasions that I plan on staying in New York City until I die. Well, when the offer came (and it was quite unexpected), it has forced me to reconsider a lot about my life as it currently stands.

1) I am not satisfied with my job. It's not that I don't like my job, but for the most part it does not fulfill me at all. On top of it, I want to kill one of my coworkers. Or at the very least tie her down and rip out her hair one strand at a time until she is bald. She was out last year on a workers comp claim and has been fighting with the WC board for quite sometime in order to receive extra treatments. Well, this week I was to cover the desk a coworker who was going to Florida for vacation. She was directly told that she could not have ANY days off this week as it would require that I cover her desk, Dan's desk, and my desk. This was something I did for a three week period in December last year and it drove me nuts.

Tuesday comes and I'm about to head upstairs to Dan's desk to cover his work when I notice that my coworker hasn't come in. I make a polite inquiry and learn that she's not coming in that day. Well I admit I got very frazzled (not to mention very pissed) and sat down to work her desk as well as mine and Dan's. I figured it was for one day and one day only so it wasn't going to be that big of a deal. I could be upset but she would be in tomorrow and that would be just fine.

Wednesday morning I learn that she has called in and said that she is not going to be in for the entire week which means that I have to cover three desks for the entire week. I am livid now. Fucking livid. My immediate boss is trying to find out what happened that would make her say that she's going to be out all week. If it was because she was fooling around in the snow and overdid herself then he and I are both in agreement she has no excuse. She knows how "fragile" she is so she should be more careful about it. Hell, after I busted up my ribs playing rugby I was in the office the very next day. It takes an act of God to keep me away from work. I have to be on my deathbed before I take a sick day.

So once again. All week. Three desks. Brian not happy.

2) The snow. I am starting to really hate it. I know this is a bad year for snow but considering we didn't have any last year then I can somewhat deal with it for a while but now it's getting ridiculous. The weather is supposedly better in San Francisco. I say supposedly because I don't rightly know enough to comment on it.

3) Then there was Tuesday night. I'm coming home from the gym and I'm on the subway (pretty packed too) and we hear that there is an "accident" at the 125th Street station. When we finally get to the 125th Street station after creeping and crawling our way down the line (it took about 45 minutes to go three stops), the car entrance I am standing in is directly aligned with the train across the platform. Inside the car, right in front of my eyes, is a body bag. Whomever was there died. I have no idea what happened, but the train car doors facing the subway tracks and not the platform are open and there are police officers standing down there which leads me to believe there might have been electrocution, he fell onto the rails, or something. But it was a body bag. Right in front of me. It's an image I still can't shake.

I dunno. Maybe I'm just reading into things but there's just a certain something that is not sitting right with me. Maybe it's the weather just getting me down. Maybe it's just the general dissatisfaction with my life. Maybe it's something I ate for dinner.

It's good that its making me question my priorities and what's important to me. Taking an inventory of your life is pretty much a necessity after every few years. I've lived in NYC for almost six years and moving here changed my life, who I am, how I view myself, the world I live in, everything. It's helped to shape me more than anything else. I don't want to say that I've outgrown the city because I don't think that's possible, but I think that I need to determine whether or not I need to stay where I am or whether or not these Tales From the City are going to take a decidely Mary Ann Singleton tone.
Quote of the Day

Ryan, will you accept this rose? -- Trista Rehn to the man of her choice, Ryan Sutter, on last night's finale of The Bachelorette.

Wednesday, February 19, 2003

It only took until almost 5pm but I can finally post something....I know I'll have more to say later today but damn it took Blogger FOREVER to get up and running or at least get to the point where I could post something.

Sigh. I guess I'll do what I always start off with...

Quote of the Day

What do you mean she's out for the entire week? She's not supposed to have a day off this week! -- Yours truly to one of my team managers upon learning that I would have to also cover for a second coworker this week despite my assurances that she would be present all week long.

Tuesday, February 18, 2003

I wasn’t exactly sure if I was going to blog about this but I guess I should since I probably need a shit load of advice on this one so here goes nothing.

I’ve been offered a job.

The job is not in New York City.

The job is not even in New York.

The job is not even on the East Coast.

The job is in California. San Francisco to be exact.

On Friday night (at least I think it was Friday), I got a voicemail to call a friend of mine who also happens to be a former high school teacher of mine with whom I have remained friends since I left high school back in 1992. I’m not sure of the entire logistics or even the name of the company right now as the job offer was pretty much handed to me early last night and I spent most of the evening kvetching about what I was going to do even though the first thing was clear – get more info before you make a decision.

Then there’s my pro and con list for each city.

New York City

Pros


Theatre. Lots of theatre.
My rugby team.
Huge entertainment mecca.
The general hubbub and excitement of the city
Public transportation system that, although I sometimes bitch and moan about it, is pretty damn good.
The Yankees
Lots and lots of friends
An apartment that I am finally at home in
A great nightlife that never seems to stop
McHales burgers
Feel free to add some more here

Cons

Um…snow. Lots of snow.
Overcrowded public transportation system that has yet to catch up with its passenger load.
Fucking tourists, who although they keep our economy somewhat nice, are still fucking tourists.
The luster of the city has somewhat worn off.
The fact that I could still be laid off from my job
A really bad economy
The continued threat of terrorist attacks.
Feel free to add some more here.

San Francisco

Pros


Better weather
They also have a gay rugby team
Um…anything else…I dunno much about San Fran except I could live out my Tales of the City fantasies. Maybe I can find my own Mrs. Madrigal.
Feel free to add more.

Cons

Earthquakes
I only know about two people there.
Feel free to add more.

Let’s just say I need to do some SF research and get a firm offer in hand (or at least a good offer) before I can make a decision.

Sigh.

Sometimes when you get settled into a nice life, something like this has to happen.

Bastards.

:)
I am so totally frightened that people are coming to my blog strictly to read about my opinions of Sarah and her bondage porn. Ya know, for all of the grief that I have given her in the past few weeks at Reality News Online, if you're willing to go out there and do stuff like that, then I kinda have to pat you on the back just a wee little bit. Personally, I've never had the inkling to do porn (although I was asked by Massive Studios this weekend if I would be interested in doing films for them -- yes, they do porn and no, they hadn't seen a picture of me and somehow, someone recommended me to them and no this is not a joke at all whatsoever...I was seriously approached about doing porn this weekend)...anyway...it's just cracking me up that's all...

Are Zora and Evan still together...I dunno. My gut instinct says no, but I could be wrong.
Quote of the Day

Heidi, you are nothing more than a goddamn motherfucking cocksucking slut who should be shot to death in front of a firing squad because at the very least it would mean that you won't reproduce and have mini-Heidi's running around to piss me off. -- Yours truly, yelling at the TV during a particularly painful Heidi moment of Joe Millionaire/

Monday, February 17, 2003

Monday Meltdown Freeze Out

I have snow drifts on the sidewalk outside my apartment that are as high as my ass.

What the hell is Ylang Ylang and don't you think they could have come up with a better name for it?

Ultimate Fighting Championships -- What's the point?

Stephen Baldwin -- is he as annoying in person as he is on TV?

Can people at the Fairway Grocery store be any more incompetent? Let's just stand in front of the door like morons and not let people in or to even grab a basket? Then these are the same people who will block you from going down an aisle and get really pissed when you politely say, "Excuse me." Then when you try to head into a line they cut you off and you have no choice but to trip them and watch as they fall to the ground -- on top of their fresh tomatos. Not that I've done this but it was fun to watch.

I'm just a bill...yes, I'm only a bill...

Something I just learned and thankfully I learned it before it actually happened to me -- overconsumption of some sugar-free foods will have a laxative effect.

Yellow snow is scary.
Quote Conversation of the Day

Male Dutch Tourst: So where are we?

Host: We're in Greenwich Village. What have you heard about Greenwich Village?

Male Dutch Tourist: Gay people.

Host: Well, yes. Gay people live here. Is that okay with you?

Male Dutch Tourist: We're dancers. What do you think?

Friday, February 14, 2003

SIGN THE BRING BACK FRENCHIE PETITION! LET HER SING ON AMERICAN IDOL!


I just love funky bizarre things like that! :)
The Anti-Valentine's Day rant continues with this haiku from Faustus:

Remember when I
said I disliked oral sex?
I meant just with you.

I fucking love Anti-Valentine's Day.
More on the Evan Marriott/Joe Millionaire Rumor Spoiler Watch...

In what may prove to be proof that Evan left without a woman at the end of the show, our blue collar faux millionaire asked President Bush's niece, supermodel Lauren Bush, for her phone number. Lauren has a boyfriend, though.

Evan did appear on Howard Stern and apparently he made some comment about host Alex McClown trying on fishnets for him. Ewww.


Taken from Be My Anti-Valentine, at NotSoSoft.com.

Thursday, February 13, 2003

From MSNBC.com's The Juice entertainment blog about Evan Marriott's secret for the final of Joe Millionaire.

I’m posting the “the real secret behind the whole show,” written by an anonymous e-mailer who claims to know Evan’s family.

"I don’t believe it myself, but it’s one helluva dubious theory that Fox can only hope is true: “Evan is not alone on the show! His identical twin brother Ethan is also on there! Basically, they each had an equal say picking girls right down to the last two. They split up the dates at first, and then dated the girls they themselves had picked."

“Evan picked the wild Sara, while Ethan loves the quiet, gentle Zora. SOOO…on the last episode, Evan sees Zora first, rejects her, then leaves. Then you see Ethan (who u think is Evan) talking to Sara and reject her. Now youre thinking what the heck! THEN, they bring both girls in together and both brothers come out and explain the whole mess.

“They tell them they are not rich, and of course, Sara isn’t impressed but Zora is relieved. THEN, Paul comes in and tells ALL of them that he IS a millionaire, and that both boys will be receiveing 1 million each!!! Too bad Sara already walked out!!!!”

So what do you think?






MSNBC Joe Millionaire Spoiler

So...what do you think of the MSNBC.com spoiler?



I can dig it.
No way in hell.
Plausible, but unlikely.
DIE, SARAH, DIE!






Current Results



Guess who was just diagnosed as diabetic?

Off to look for what I can now eat.....gotta change the diet...
So who will Trista Rehn pick in next week's season finale of The Bachelorette?






Bachelorette

Who will Trista pick?









Current Results





And don't forget about Evan/Joe and his two lovely ladies...






Joe Millionaire

Who will Joe Millionaire/Evan Marriott pick as the final woman next Monday night?









Current Results



And now for a little musical interlude to the tune of "If You're Happy and You Know It Clap Your Hands"...

If You're Happy And You Know It Bomb Iraq
by John Robbins

If you cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are Saudi,
And your alibi is shoddy,
And your tastes remain quite gaudy,
Bomb Iraq.

If you never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If you think that SUVs,
Are the best thing since sliced cheese,
And your father you must please,
Bomb Iraq.

If the globe is quickly warming, bomb Iraq.
If the poor will soon be storming, bomb Iraq.
We assert that might makes right,
Burning oil is a delight,
For the empire we will fight,
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think that someone's dissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.

If corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain't easy,
And your manhood's getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might now knows no borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We'll call it treason,
It's the make war not love season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq.
Quote of the Day

You have to learn to think rugby. -- Coach Cain on what it will take to make me a better rugby player.

Wednesday, February 12, 2003

Sigh. After that last post...Anti-Valentines Day party anyone?
Sigh. Ya know. There are just times when I want to go on a large killing spree and I will start with this guy whose email is below. He and I met and were ultimately going to get together but due to our schedules and such, we were never able to get together although we talked on the phone practically every night for over an hour each time. So I called him this weekend and left him a message. No call back. No email on Monday -- and we email each other several times a day. Dropped him an email yesterday. No response when I got home. Just checked my email and here's the message I got.

Hi there-
Sorry for not getting back to you this weekend. Long story short, I ran into my X on Friday night when I was at my friends and blah blah blah. Friday night we decided to go to his winter place for the weekend and catch up. Truth is, I have missed him and been miserable without him and he now understands why I left him and we are going to try to work it out. I really love him and haven’t stopped loving him since we broke up in Aug. Enough of that.

I am sorry that we were never able to get it together to meet. To this day I still don’t really understand that one.

Anyway, I have to get rolling to a media buying meeting and wanted to let you know what is going on with me. I am going with him tonight to reconnect with his family-yikes they hate me for hurting their son, so I guess his Mom will be serving crow for dinner……

Take it easy in the gym for God’s Sake you will end up a cripple. Is everything ok your going back to the Dr?

Talk soon.


Geez. You couldn't just come out and tell me this earlier? I didn't know about the ex. I didn't know he still had feelings for an ex. It would have been nice to have known this a lot earlier. Well. What the fuck am I gonna do? Pick myself up, dust myself off, start all over again.
Doesn't this qualify as a sign of the coming of the Anti-Christ?

Yes? No? Bueller?
Got my blood test results from my doctor. Granted I was a day early and he doesn't have afternoon patients on Tuesdays but was willing to see me anyway and for that I am thankful.

STDs -- none. Pretty much knew that since I'm...well....pretty much a monk. But it was nice to have it all confirmed.

Cholesterol -- Bad cholesterol was at 103 which is pretty damn good I think. Good cholesterol though was low. Around 30 something. Surprised my mother when I told her considering my recent workout routine. So I need to look into ways of getting that increased. The doc is wondering if it may be due to heredity but my parents both have high levels of the good cholesterol so I may just need to adjust my diet.

Blood sugar -- Well. It was high. Not really surprised but it was 25% higher than the normal levels which was the surprising part. I had some more blood withdrawn and they are going to test it for Diabetes 2, something my father was diagnosed with a few years ago. If I do test for it, Doc thinks it can be treated with diet and exercise. Heck, I'm already excerising enough as it is, don't you think? Mom says I need to watch my starch intake if I am diagnosed with it.

Had the first of the Heptatis shots as well yesterday. Next one is in a month.

I did run 6.66 miles (please note that it was 666 -- the number of Satan) on the runner yesterday. I've said it before (maybe not on here but out loud) that I don't care how strong your legs are or how much you can squat, clean and jerk, snatch, press, etc. If you don't have the endurance to complete the game (and we run like hell during those games) then it's not going to amount to a hill of beans how much weight you have on the plate loaded seated leg press. That's why I run for an hour each day at the gym. I want that endurance. It will ultimately be what separates people on the team. I'm getting there. Nowhere near where I want to be, but I am getting there.

My goal for this rugby season is to learn the game better and become a better all around player. I'm not gunning for a starting position on the "A" side squad this season. I want to become a better player, understand the laws of rugby better, and THEN I will contest for a starting position. I fully believe that there are a lot of people on the squad who haven't done very much work in the off-season and are expecting to pick up right where they left off and as if nothing has changed.

Hoo boy. They are in for a surprise.
Quote of the Day

I'm voting Turtle off Randall's Island. I think he's gotten a little grumpy. And I think he's hungry. -- Yours truly at last night's rugby team board meeting where I suddenly channelled Kathy Griffin's appearance on The Weakest Link in a moment of reality TV hysteria. Oh, and Turtle said I was cute last night. It's about time a man said that to me.

Tuesday, February 11, 2003

Something tells me that going to the Museum of Sex as part of a bachelor auction date would not go over well.

Then again....
The full list of Oscar nominees are with my personal pics to win in BOLD despite the fact that once again I was not nominated -- a scandal akin to that of the Bloggies. Interesting to note that Richard Gere did not get a Best Actor nomination and Adaptation is was missing from the list of best films. I said Chicago would get 15 nominations, they got 13. They would have had 14 if Richard Gere had gotten a Best Actor nomination. Gangs of New York got 10. Brian said 10. The Hours got 9 nominations. I said 8. The Lord of the Rings got 6 nominations. I also said 6. And Adaptation got four nominations as opposed to my belief they could get seven. Sigh. Oh well. Can't win them all.

Performance by an actor in a leading role
Adrien Brody in THE PIANIST (Focus Features)
Nicolas Cage in ADAPTATION (Sony Pictures Releasing)
Michael Caine in THE QUIET AMERICAN (Miramax and Intermedia)
Daniel Day-Lewis in GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax)
Jack Nicholson in ABOUT SCHMIDT (New Line)

Performance by an actor in a supporting role
Chris Cooper in ADAPTATION (Sony Pictures Releasing)
Ed Harris in THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax)
Paul Newman in ROAD TO PERDITION (DreamWorks and 20th Century Fox)
John C. Reilly in CHICAGO (Miramax)
Christopher Walken in CATCH ME IF YOU CAN (DreamWorks)

Performance by an actress in a leading role
Salma Hayek in FRIDA (Miramax)
Nicole Kidman in THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax)
Diane Lane in UNFAITHFUL (20th Century Fox)
Julianne Moore in FAR FROM HEAVEN (Focus Features)
Renée Zellweger in CHICAGO (Miramax)

Performance by an actress in a supporting role
Kathy Bates in ABOUT SCHMIDT (New Line)
Julianne Moore in THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax)
Queen Latifah in CHICAGO (Miramax)
Meryl Streep in ADAPTATION (Sony Pictures Releasing)
Catherine Zeta-Jones in CHICAGO (Miramax)

Best animated feature film of the year
ICE AGE (20th Century Fox) Chris Wedge
LILO & STITCH (Buena Vista) Chris Sanders
SPIRIT: STALLION OF THE CIMARRON (DreamWorks) Jeffrey Katzenberg
SPIRITED AWAY (Buena Vista) Hayao Miyazaki
TREASURE PLANET (Buena Vista) Ron Clements

Achievement in art direction
CHICAGO (Miramax) Art Direction: John Myhre
Set Decoration: Gord Sim

FRIDA (Miramax) Art Direction: Felipe Fernandez del Paso
Set Decoration: Hannia Robledo

GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax) Art Direction: Dante Ferretti
Set Decoration: Francesca Lo Schiavo

THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS (New Line) Art Direction: Grant Major
Set Decoration: Dan Hennah and Alan Lee


ROAD TO PERDITION (DreamWorks and 20th Century Fox) Art Direction: Dennis Gassner
Set Decoration: Nancy Haigh

Achievement in cinematography
CHICAGO (Miramax) Dion Beebe
FAR FROM HEAVEN (Focus Features) Edward Lachman
GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax) Michael Ballhaus
THE PIANIST (Focus Features) Pawel Edelman
ROAD TO PERDITION (DreamWorks and 20th Century Fox) Conrad L. Hall

Achievement in costume design
CHICAGO (Miramax) Colleen Atwood
FRIDA (Miramax) Julie Weiss
GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax) Sandy Powell
THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax) Ann Roth
THE PIANIST (Focus Features) Anna Sheppard

Achievement in directing
CHICAGO (Miramax) Rob Marshall
GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax) Martin Scorsese
THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax) Stephen Daldry
THE PIANIST (Focus Features) Roman Polanski
TALK TO HER (Sony Pictures Classics) Pedro Almodóvar

Best documentary feature
BOWLING FOR COLUMBINE (United Artists and Alliance Atlantis)
A Salter Street Films/VIF 2/Dog Eat Dog Films Production
Michael Moore and Michael Donovan


DAUGHTER FROM DANANG (Balcony Releasing in association with Cowboy Pictures)
An Interfaze Educational Production
Gail Dolgin and Vincente Franco

PRISONER OF PARADISE (Alliance Atlantis)
A Média Vérité/Café Production
Malcolm Clarke and Stuart Sender

SPELLBOUND (THINKFilm)
A Blitz/Welch Production
Jeffrey Blitz and Sean Welch

WINGED MIGRATION (Sony Pictures Classics)
A Galatée Films/France 2 Cinéma/France 3 Cinéma/Les Productions de la Guéville/Bac Films/Pandora Film/Les Productions JMH/Wanda Vision/Eyescreen Production
Jacques Perrin

Best documentary short subject

THE COLLECTOR OF BEDFORD STREET
An Alice Elliott Production
Alice Elliott

MIGHTY TIMES: THE LEGACY OF ROSA PARKS
A Tell the Truth Pictures Production
Robert Hudson and Bobby Houston


TWIN TOWERS
A Wolf Films/Shape Pictures/Universal/Mopo Entertainment Production
Bill Guttentag and Robert David Port

WHY CAN'T WE BE A FAMILY AGAIN?
A Public Policy Production
Roger Weisberg and Murray Nossel

Achievement in film editing
CHICAGO (Miramax) Martin Walsh
GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax) Thelma Schoonmaker
THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax) Peter Boyle
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS (New Line) Michael Horton
THE PIANIST (Focus Features) Hervé de Luze

Best foreign language film of the year

EL CRIMEN DEL PADRE AMARO An Alameda Films/BluFilms/Foprocine/Gob. del Estado de Veracruz-Llave Production
Mexico

HERO
A Beijing New Picture Film Company/Elite Group Enterprises Production
People's Republic of China

THE MAN WITHOUT A PAST
A Sputnik Oy/Pandora Film/Pyramide Prods. Production
Finland


NOWHERE IN AFRICA
An MTM Medien & Television München Production
Germany

ZUS & ZO
A Filmprodukties de Luwte Production
The Netherlands

Achievement in makeup
FRIDA (Miramax) John Jackson and Beatrice De Alba
THE TIME MACHINE (DreamWorks and Warner Bros.) John M. Elliott, Jr. and Barbara Lorenz

Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original score)
CATCH ME IF YOU CAN (DreamWorks) John Williams
FAR FROM HEAVEN (Focus Features) Elmer Bernstein
FRIDA (Miramax) Elliot Goldenthal
THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax) Philip Glass
ROAD TO PERDITION (DreamWorks and 20th Century Fox) Thomas Newman

Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original song)
Burn It Blue from FRIDA (Miramax)
Music by Elliot Goldenthal
Lyric by Julie Taymor

Father and Daughter from THE WILD THORNBERRYS MOVIE (Paramount and Nickelodeon Movies)
Music and Lyric by Paul Simon

The Hands That Built America from GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax)
Music and Lyric by Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen

I Move On from CHICAGO (Miramax)
Music by John Kander
Lyric by Fred Ebb


Lose Yourself from 8 MILE (Universal)
Music by Eminem, Jeff Bass and Luis Resto
Lyric by Eminem

Best motion picture of the year

CHICAGO (Miramax)
A Producer Circle Co., Zadan/Meron Production
Martin Richards, Producer


GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax)
An Alberto Grimaldi Production
Alberto Grimaldi and Harvey Weinstein, Producers

THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax)
A Scott Rudin/Robert Fox Production
Scott Rudin and Robert Fox, Producers

THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS (New Line)
A New Line Cinema and Wingnut Films Production
Barrie M. Osborne, Fran Walsh and Peter Jackson, Producers

THE PIANIST (Focus Features)
An R.P. Productions, Heritage Films, Studio Babelsberg, Runtime LTD. Production
Roman Polanski, Robert Benmussa and Alain Sarde, Producers

Best animated short film

THE CATHEDRAL
A Platige Image Production
Tomek Baginski

THE CHUBBCHUBBS! (Columbia)
A Sony Pictures Imageworks Production
Eric Armstrong

DAS RAD
A Filmakademie Baden-Württemberg GmbH Production
Chris Stenner and Heidi Wittlinger

MIKE'S NEW CAR (Buena Vista)
A Pixar Animation Studios Production
Pete Docter and Roger Gould


MT. HEAD
A Yamamura Animation Production
Koji Yamamura

Best live action short film

FAIT D'HIVER
An Another Dimension of an Idea Production
Dirk Beliën and Anja Daelemans

I'LL WAIT FOR THE NEXT ONE … (J'ATTENDRAI LE SUIVANT …)
A La Boîte Production
Philippe Orreindy and Thomas Gaudin

INJA (DOG)
An Australian Film TV & Radio School (AFTRS) Production
Steven Pasvolsky and Joe Weatherstone

JOHNNY FLYNTON
A Red Corner Production
Lexi Alexander and Alexander Buono

THIS CHARMING MAN (DER ER EN YNDIG MAND)
An M&M Productions for Novellefilm Production
Martin Strange-Hansen and Mie Andreasen


Achievement in sound

CHICAGO (Miramax) Michael Minkler, Dominick Tavella and David Lee
GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax) Tom Fleischman, Eugene Gearty and Ivan Sharrock
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS (New Line) Christopher Boyes, Michael Semanick, Michael Hedges and Hammond Peek
ROAD TO PERDITION (DreamWorks and 20th Century Fox) Scott Millan, Bob Beemer and John Patrick Pritchett
SPIDER-MAN (Sony Pictures Releasing) Kevin O'Connell, Greg P. Russell and Ed Novick

Achievement in sound editing
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS (New Line) Ethan Van der Ryn and Michael Hopkins
MINORITY REPORT (20th Century Fox and DreamWorks) Richard Hymns and Gary Rydstrom
ROAD TO PERDITION (DreamWorks and 20th Century Fox) Scott A. Hecker

Achievement in visual effects
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWO TOWERS (New Line) Jim Rygiel, Joe Letteri, Randall William Cook and Alex Funke
SPIDER-MAN (Sony Pictures Releasing) John Dykstra, Scott Stokdyk, Anthony LaMolinara and John Frazier
STAR WARS EPISODE II ATTACK OF THE CLONES (20th Century Fox) Rob Coleman, Pablo Helman, John Knoll and Ben Snow

Adapted screenplay
ABOUT A BOY (Universal) Screenplay by Peter Hedges and Chris Weitz & Paul Weitz
ADAPTATION (Sony Pictures Releasing) Screenplay by Charlie Kaufman and Donald Kaufman
CHICAGO (Miramax) Screenplay by Bill Condon
THE HOURS (Paramount and Miramax) Screenplay by David Hare
THE PIANIST (Focus Features) Screenplay by Ronald Harwood

Original screenplay
FAR FROM HEAVEN (Focus Features) Written by Todd Haynes
GANGS OF NEW YORK (Miramax) Screenplay by Jay Cocks and Steve Zaillian and Kenneth Lonergan, Story by Jay Cocks
MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING (IFC/Gold Circle Films) Written by Nia Vardalos
TALK TO HER (Sony Pictures Classics) Written by Pedro Almodóvar
Y TU MAMÁ TAMBIÉN (IFC Films) Written by Carlos Cuarón and Alfonso Cuarón


Okay just before the Oscar noms come out let me make some quick picks in the Best Picture category as well as nomination totals

BEST PICTURE

ADAPTATION
CHICAGO
GANGS OF NEW YORK
THE HOURS
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWIN TOWERS

As for nomination totals

CHICAGO -- 15 nominations (I'm being overly generous)
GANGS OF NEW YORK -- 10 nominations
THE HOURS -- 8 nominations
ADAPTATION -- 7 nominations
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE TWIN TOWERS -- 6 nominations
So....who do you think Joe Millionaire (aka Evan Marriott, construction worker/underwear model/actor/wrestler) is going to choose next Monday night? Sarah or Zora?






Joe Millionaire

Who will Joe Millionaire/Evan Marriott pick as the final woman next Monday night?









Current Results




Quote of the Day

Holy shit! -- Yours truly upon seeing I did a personal best of 6.60 miles of the elliptical runner yesterday afternoon.

Monday, February 10, 2003

I'm off to go run six miles now.

Someone shoot me. Please.
Poor Steven. Lose your job and now this.

Oh and one of my coworkers needs to buy a...and I swear I am not making this up...a chocolate penis for his mother. Any suggestions?
The Best (or Worst) of Psychic Michael Jackson

(taken from Entertainment Weekly)

#5 -- ''Just think, nobody thought this would last!'' (After smooching then-wife Lisa Marie Presley at the 1994 MTV Video Music Awards. She filed for divorce 16 months later).

#4 -- ''When I was a little boy in Indiana, if someone had told me that one day I would be getting, as a musician, the Artist of the Millennium Award, I wouldn't have believed it. It's really amazing, I can't believe it.... David Blaine, your magic is real and I believe in you.'' (2002 VMA speech. What makes this especially wacky is that Jackson didn't receive an award that night.)

#3 -- ''It saddens me that many may actually believe the present flurry of false accusations... No, I've never taken hormones to maintain my high voice! No, I've never had my cheekbones altered in any way! No, I've never had cosmetic surgery on my eyes! As noted earlier, I love children. We all know that kids are very impressionable and therefore susceptible to such stories.'' (Statement released to the media, 1984)

#2 -- ''I've never had my cheekbones done, never had my eyes done, never had my lips done and all this stuff. [But] I'm never pleased with anything. I'm a perfectionist; it's part of who I am. I'm never pleased with myself. I try not to look in the mirror.'' (Oprah Winfrey interview, 1993)

#1 -- ''It's not just boys, and I've never invited just boys to come in my room. C'mon, that's just ridiculous.... I have never invited anyone into my bed, ever. Children love me. I love them. They follow me. They want to be with me. But anybody can come in my bed. A child can come in my bed if they want.'' (''Prime Time Live,'' 1996)
Monday Meltdown

Okay, this makes no sense to me, but at the gym my rugby team uses on Saturday mornings, I get better performance doing dips and chin ups there than I do at my regular gym. But then there are some machines where it’s the opposite. Why is that?

Since when did my floor become more comfortable to sleep on than my bed?

Hot glue, when melted and not in stick form, is really hot.

I caught something on public access TV that made me wonder about the world we live in. I don’t know what the event was or what it was for but there was this big Italian guy at some dance hall/ballroom/some place where they had a band on a dais, and he introduced his son. Mind you, big Italian guy had this thick Brooklyn accent and his son…well…his song was doing his “I’m a white guy trying to sound like a black rapper” voice. It was just odd. The son was a horrible rapper, too.

Oscar nominations come out tomorrow. Eh. Who really cares? Chicago, The Hours, and, Gangs of New York will be the big winners. Everyone else. Eh.

The new Harry Potter is going to sell for $30. Who cares? People will still buy it. I have better things to read.

GenSoy bars. Yum. Especially the sour apple crisp ones. Double yum. Kashi bars are a nice runner up.

Someone told me that researchers have found that “kumquat” is the funniest word in the English language. I’m more apt to choose “plethora” or maybe “ubiquitous.”

I caught myself watching an episode of American Gladiators last night and I had to ask myself, “Whatever happened to these people and when the heck is Fox going to buy the rights and revive it to follow American Idol?”

Robyn Byrd needs to retire that crochet thing she always wears. Oh wait. That was from about ten years ago. She still needed to retire it.

Blind date guy (yes the man who I was supposed to have a date with weeks ago but due to illness, injuries, vacations, etc., we have yet to hook up) is going out of town on Valentine’s Day. To Vermont. Sigh. I love Vermont.

My legs hurt.

I was reading through Paul Katcher’s account of his trip to Hedonism II. Interesting to note that there were plenty of bisexual men propositioning their same sex counterparts for sex but not willing to do it out in the open. Or at least Paul didn’t see it happening. Note to self. Hedonism II sound like too much fun for me.

I found out at the Blogger Bash that I’m not really good at innuendo (or maybe I was just too tired). Although direction propositioning I’m very good at. Too bad I was doing that to Jane Galt and not to the one man that everyone was gawking over (and for good reason). I was instructed to give him a big kiss on the lips by someone who was unable to attend (female just so ya know Alex) but I thought that would be a bit forward. The other hot bachelor of the night, although he may not realize this, was this guy. More than a few women were gushing over him.

Another Blogger Bash note…it’s nice to know that you and you thought I was cute and adorable. Now why can’t other men think that??? (At least men that would be interested in other men.) Harumph.

No matter how drunk I get, just remember that I am not a sucker for man woman sex. Ooh baby. Ooh baby. Ooh.
Quote of the Day

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it. -- W.C. Fields

Saturday, February 08, 2003

Many thanks to everyone who came to the 14th Annual Big Apple Bloggers Bash. If you missed my dramatic telling of the history of the Blogger Bashes (yes, all fourteen years) just talk to my gangsta bitch, Ursula. There were many of you that I met that I got to talk to for a few minutes and some I got to meet for the first time and had a great time with. Then there are some of you that showed up and weren't on the reservation list and I had some great conversations with you and would love to link you in to the Tales Underground Line (found over to the left). Like Gary? Who the heck are ya? Choire? I think you're with EastWest but I'm too tired to go over there and look.

Anyway, I'll blog about this again soon. It was a lot of fun. I had fun playing host. You made it all worth doing! Who knows...I may do it again!

Friday, February 07, 2003

Gawker's pictures of Leona Helmsley are scaring me. It's more or less whose scarier now -- Leona Helmsley or Michael Jackson? Either one of them appearing on my doorstep at Halloween would frighten the hell out of me.

So vote now. Which is scarier?








Scary

Which is scarier -- Leona, Michael, or that dog?



Leona Helmsley
Michael Jackson
That dog






Current Results



Current bachelor auction date idea...

Breakfast at Tiffanys -- croissants and coffee standing outside the Tiffanys store on Fifth Avenue looking at the diamonds and then go in and browse around when the store opens (just like in the movie a la Hepburn)

Three Hour Carriage Ride through Central Park (more on this as it relates to the quiz in a moment) -- For the history and nature buff in your life, this three hour excursion of New York's most beautiful landmark is a gloriously green sight-seeing alternative. A knowledgeable driver will give a detailed description of all the famous spots while also pointing to lesser known areas and facts about the Park's extraordinary landscaping and history. (This from MagicRibbon.com.) Champagne courtesy of yours truly.

By then we should be ready for dinner and I'm looking at the nice Cafe Loup in Union Square (must talk to friend about dinner for 2 pass there first of course).

Possible additions to this day include a ride on the carousel in Central Park or possibly even a Broadway or off-Broadway show.

Now I know you all want me to do the hot air balooning but the cost of that would be $450 and I could try to get them to donate the cost for one person if I paid for the other but then there is the cost of transportation to New Jersey (same deal for skydiving) to the location to actually do the event. Now, if someone own or knows of a limo company that would be willing to donate a day's worth of limo service let me know. NOW! :)
Damn. Why can't more parents have the attitude towards sex as the Pattersons do in For Better or For Worse? Maybe it's because they're Canadian?
Quote of the Day

Can I put my clothes on now before this turns into a sorority porn and I'm the headmistress? -- Kathy Griffin running in her bathing suit on Celebrity Mole Hawaii

Thursday, February 06, 2003






Bachelor Auction


Which of the following activities are you most likely to bid on at a bachelor or bachelorette auction (and by bidding I also mean want to win!)? Remember all events do include dinner.




Current Results

I went to the doctor yesterday for a physical and while I was there I consented to have an HIV test done as well. It’s the smart thing to do since I am a sexually active gay man and it would be nice to know what status because sadly even I admit that I have fallen into a sense of complacency regarding AIDS. Yes, when I have sex it’s protected, but that’s never a 100% guarantee that I will be STD free.

Anyway, I like my new doctor. And yes, for those that are wondering, he’s gay as well. My friend Alison has always asked why a gay this or a gay that? She’s never understood the need for a group to be specifically gay identified. I keep telling her it’s the same as why there are women’s groups – it allows for a safe environment where you are amongst people of your own ilk. It’s something along the lines of people who belong to organizations based upon religion, nationality, and even race.

Being a gay man and having a doctor who is gay is practically the equivalent of a woman going to doctor who is a woman as well. They immediately relate to you. They know the right questions to ask and aren’t embarrassed about asking them. My last doctor never asked about my sexuality or if I had a boyfriend. His patient info file never had the space for “partnered” to be checked. And what was great about it was that he went into details about the two hepatitis vaccines (and no, I do not have hepatitis) that as a “sexually active gay man” (or so he said, personally I’m like, “What sex?”) I should not only be aware of but also get done as well. Granted, I hate needles and getting shots, but hell, my last doctor never brought this up to me before.

It’s a comfort level. It’s knowing that when you walk into that office you aren’t concerned that your doctor is going to freak out when you tell him (or her) that you’re gay. It’s knowing that they are more than understanding of the health concerns you have because they have them as well.

Now you’re probably wondering how the heck did I find a doctor that’s gay? I went through GLMA, the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association. They tell you which doctors are in the association and which ones accept which insurance coverage. It’s very simple. Very easy. And worth it.
Quote of the Day

Actual war is a very messy business. Very, very messy business. -- Captain James T. Kirk, Star Trek

Wednesday, February 05, 2003

Well we could play Reading Between the Lines today but I was given some news that I must share with everyone because I'm a nice kind good person. (What? Laughing? Do I hear laughing???)

Aaron and Helene from Bachelor 2 have formally split up. Rumors have it that it was because he didn't attend her birthday party earlier this year. Well having a long distance relationship is pretty hard but having such a public one? This means that it's the second relationship from The Bachelor program to have failed. I don't care what Alex and Amanda say, if he's trying to pursue an acting career in California and she's doing a radio show in Kansas then something tells me that they aren't exactly making any major plans to get together.

In other news, this one comes via a friend in the recording business who overheard major executives at CNN and CBS discussing, of all things, the former relationship of one Mr. Tom Cruise and one Ms. Nicole Kidman. According to them (and I'm only reporting what is, after all hearsay and according to some people already in the public knowledge as a possible rumor), Mr. Cruise and Ms. Kidman had a ten year marriage contract where he would help advance her career because he was having an affair with Ms. Kidman's brother. Now if that's true, it's pretty sad. It's the oldest, saddest trick in the book and you would think that they would be a bit more creative.

Now in personal gossip, and I guess it's not really gossip since I'm going ahead and printing something that I alluded to about a month or so back, it's official...you can buy a date with the (646) Guy at a bachelor auction to benefit my rugby team in a few months. If mine goes well...then my date involves skydiving...I just gotta convince a place to donate a dive if I purchase one. That way at the very least they will get some money for a jump and not feel bad about donating or something like that. If I can't get skydiving done then I need to come up with something equally fantastic...any suggestions?
Quote of the Day

Say good night Mr. Fisty! -- Yours truly last night at a rugby team fundraising meeting making a horrible Muppets/fisting reference in the middle of the meeting.

Tuesday, February 04, 2003

So...I got some interesting news yesterday.

Old Crush (although I have been told he should be called the Dowager Crush since he's a crush but without the power that a crush would normally have) is moving to Florida with his new paramour. That's right...Old Crush is leaving NYC and moving to Florida. He'll be about two hours away from where my parents live so there is the possibility that I would get the chance to see him again when I visit my family.

Here's the funny thing though (and I credit my buddy Joni with this one). I'd rather have him as a friend than a lover now. I've really come to value the friendship I have with him and what it means to me. To not have him around or see him on a regular basis is going to be a little difficult because we've always had so much fun goofing around and cracking jokes with each other. His mother recently passed away and he's taking it as a sign that he needs to change things in his life or at least bring him some solace and peace. Part of me wonders if he's just running away from his problems but sadly it's not something that I feel I could broach with him -- no matter how good of a friend he is.
Quote of the Day

My first secret is that he might not be the father of our son Jacob. And my second secret is that I'm two months pregnant and this child might not be his either. -- A guest on the Maury Povich Show on one of his routine episodes about paternity tests after telling the audience that her husband was the love of her life. Yet...she still cheated on him. Twice. Hmmm.

Monday, February 03, 2003

Monday Meltdown

I was at the gym this weekend with the rugby team when I learned of the Space Shuttle Columbia tragedy. It was odd because a few days earlier I was talking with friends about the Space Shuttle Challenger disaster and where we were and how we felt at the time. It was hard to watch the newscast on MSNBC and do an hour on the elliptical runner. The odd thing is that you just knew that it wasn't going to end well for anyone.

Waking the Dead on BBC America has become Must See TV for me on Sundays. It's their version of CSI combined with Cold Case Files that is so superbly written and acted that it's just mesmerizing to watch.

I didn't have my blind date this past Friday as originally planned. I was shafted into a post-work party and Jay wasn't feeling that well to begin with so we agreed to meet up this weekend. Then I caught the flu and felt like my entire body was going to turn on me and beat me with my own legs or something like that. We did talk on the phone for over an hour last night. So I'm taking it as a good thing. I just wonder what he looks like...that's right...we haven't seen pictures of each other.

I'm supposed to have a physical on Wednesday. I just hope my doctor isn't on strike.

I always wondered why the people of Cabot Cove, Maine, didn't force Jessica Fletcher to move when all of the murders started happening in that small town. I mean, they must have had the highest murder rate in all of Maine. One per week for something like ten years or something. And even when she went out of town a murder happened. Once is okay. But wouldn't you think twice about asking her to come visit when they keep happening over and over and over.

Who the heck is going to replace Bob Barker when he decides to leave The Price is Right? I mean...what other creepy old man is going to take his place?

Some of us at work are contemplating having a pool as to when President Bush is finally going to go ahead and invade Iraq. I mean we all know what's going to happen, it's just a matter of when.

Seems like no one felt like playing my Reading Between the Lines game because only one person responded and they were wrong (sorry Allan -- or however you spell your name). The correct answer was number 4 -- the one about Sharon Stone.

I'm not a sucker for man-woman sex. It doesn't matter how drunk I get.

I found my passport and looked at the picture I took back in May or whenever it was. It doesn't even look like me anymore. My ID from work -- same thing. People on the rugby team saw my work ID and the picture and said, "Oh yeah. We remember him. Who was that?" I keep surprising one teammate each time he sees me with my weight loss. It makes me feel good. Just makes me hope things work out well with this guy Jay. He seems like a nice guy so I have no complaints. So far. :) Maybe I'll convince him to come to the Blogger Bash.

Speaking of the Blogger Bash...are you coming?

I'm a whore for Gawker.

What's up with that chick Sarah from the Joe Millionaire show having done bondage porn or something like that? Imagine if Evan Marriott had heard about this during the show. I imagine his response would be something along the lines of, "Well that kinda cool ya know. I mean if that's what she's into and all." And I swear can they make him sound any stupider than he already does?

And speaking of bachelors, poor Greg got arrested or detained or something while he was heading out to California (most likely to shoot the reunion episode of The Bachelorette. Sure he just wanted the rest but he should have had a prescription or something. Oh well. Misunderstanding I'm sure.

Rosie Perez has great tits. Don't ask me how I know this but I just do.

I'm going to crawl back into bed now. Bye bye.
Quote of the Day

I feel like I've just been used as the main attraction in a twenty five man gang bang orgy. -- Yours truly in trying to explain the effects of the flu I acquired over the weekend to a friend.