Monday, May 31, 2004

Questions, Comments, Snide Remarks

So I found out that I do have the Blogger commenting system on here. However, to use it, you have to click on the time stamp for each individual post and then log in a comment. I'm working to fix it so they appear on the first screen.

So if anyone knows HTML, drop me a line. Sigh...I hate HTML...

Friday, May 28, 2004

It's Almost Eerie

I will be working my fifth Tony Awards ceremony next weekend and I just got word as to who I will (most likely) be working with...

Laura Linney.

Laura "Mary Ann Singleton from Tales of the City" Linney.

It makes me giggle...and smirk.

Quote of the Day

When cooking rats, I would imagine that sauce is of the utmost importance. -- Greg Buis, Survivor: Borneo

Thursday, May 27, 2004

Headaches, Thigh Aches, Tummy Aches

1) I ate too much last night.

2) Way too much.

3) My head is pounding right now and no one in the office has any aspirin.

4) Physical therapy should either be classified as a terrorist activity or cruel and unusual punishment.

5) I work with morons. They are the cause of #3.

6) The asshole of a coworker who liked to speed me through cross-training me on his work and then complain when I would constantly ask him questions is now gone thanks to taking a position at a different company.

7) I get a nice chunk of his work. See #3 again. Coupled with a slight bit of #5.

8) I've been trying to get the commenting system back up on this blog but keep fucking it up. I hate HTML.

9) My failure to properly to do HTML coding is not a part of #3.

10) I'm looking at a new apartment tonight as my sublet is up at the end of June. Technically I'm looking at three apartments. Maybe more should the opportunities present themselves.

11) I hate moving.

12) It's going to make #3 a lot more worse.

13) Three is not a magic number.

Quote of the Day

8:26: Jasmine? Did she even have time to get back to Hawaii? And why "Midnight Train to Georgia" all the time -- how about giving other Georgia songs their due. "Devil Went Down to Georgia," maybe, or "The Night The Lights Went out in Georgia"? That's the problem with "American Idol," not enough Vicki Lawrence. -- From today's Test Pattern on MSNBC

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Google Bombing

I saw this article today and it made me wonder what words I could use for the Bush-Cheney website?

Dumb ass?

My the list just does on and on and on.....

Candle burning at both ends....and the middle too...

There are days I fear I am slowly slipping back into the trend of piling task upon project upon task in an effort to keep myself busy and not allow myself the time to relax and enjoy life.

Earlier this month I agreed to take on the organizing responsibilities should our team be awarded the next Bingham Cup (either in 2005 or 2006). This would mean an intense year (or less than) of promotion, sponsorship gathering, organizing, fending off people who have no business bothering me, headaches, screams, and planning, planning, planning.

At the end of June...I have to move into a new apartment. Therefore there's packing to be done. Things to be thrown away. A little more condensing done. Then again there's also the need for a new apartment. I have a few leads and I'm juggling them as well as I can but ugh it's getting to be a little stressful already.

Finally...argh...FINALLY...there's finances. Somehow I have to manage to live on next to NOTHING (and I do mean NOTHING) for the next 3 more weeks so I can prep, plan, and do whatever I can to make sure this move comes off without a hitch.

Last night I came really close to just breaking down and crying so I could have some emotional outlet and somehow just managed to pull it all together before it really got bad. We're talking about the kind of crying that I normally reserve for the end of A League of Our Own when Geena Davis and Lori Petty's characters have a big hug and seem to reconcile their entire past and for some reason I just find it very moving and start to cry.

And cry and cry and cry and cry. I can't explain it. It's just a reaction.

I think once I finally get some stability in terms of living space and so forth, it's all going to be a good thing.

Quote of the Day

Warning: Do not use if you are pregnant, suspect that you are pregnant, or while breastfeeding. -- Warning label on my new bottle of Lipitor from the pharmacy.

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

This week...this week...this week...

I'm not sure if I can make it through this week without going ballistic on some poor soul's ass.

First, Psycho, the hypochondriac coworker, came into the office at around 845 this morning. At 915 I was copied on an email from her to another department saying that she was leaving and that her work should be forwarded to me. I said, louder than I expected, "Why the fuck did you even bother coming into the office?"

Second, my coworker whose last day I thought was this Friday is actually TOMORROW. That means I have to spend the next TWO HOURS trying to learn his entire job in his bass ackwards style because...well...he doesn't really know how to train people to do work.

Third, kumquats. Just because.

Finally, I was on the phone with my mother today only to have to her ask when I was leaving for London...because she forgot I wasn't going. Salt. Wound. Mix in generous proportions.

The kicker of it all is that, oddly enough, I'm now one of the more senior people in my department and have quite a bit of job security. Not that it gives me any advantage or special privileges or the fact that I'm still trying to leave a job that I find to be tedious beyond belief but pays me well enough (although trust me it could be a lot better). Should I make it for one more year, I believe that will give me a fourth week of vacation but I'm not entirely sure. It's not like I get to take much vacation now as it is.

Eh...we'll see. I'm not really counting on anything at this point. Life is just one big ass mystery.

Quote of the Day

In our country, true teams rarely barriers and personal
ambitions have reduced athletes to dissolute cliques or individuals thrown together for mutual profit...Yet these rugby players. with their
muddied, cracked bodies, are struggling to hold onto a sense of humanity
that we in America have lost and are unlikely to regain. The game may only be to move a ball forward on a dirt field, but the task can be
accomplished with an unshackled joy and its memories will be a permanent
delight. The women and men who play on that rugby field are more alive than too many of us will ever be. The foolish emptiness we think we perceive in their existence is only our own.
-- Victor Cahn

Monday, May 24, 2004

Blah, blah-er....blah-est....BLAH

Welcome to my world.

It's not been a good week already.

Things have broken.

Contact lenses have been lost.

Sleep has not been....slept.

And to really top it all off, people keep wishing me (and the team) to do well in London and I've had to very politely tell them that I'm not going to London but I appreciate their well wishes only for them to blurt out how sorry they are that I can't go and blah, blah, blah.

How the fuck do you think I feel? If it wasn't for this freakin' job and the hell I'm in right now then I would be going and having Lord knows how much wild and crazy kinky perverse sex. Okay probably not that, but I would at least be having fun.


So thank you for wishing my team well in London this coming week. Yes, I sure wish I could be there but, alas, my power for good and not evil are needed elsewhere this coming week. But I thank you. Yes, I thank you for reminding me once again about a trip I've been thinking about since November of last year. A trip that I'm ultimately NOT going on.

Yep...thanks. Thanks a lot.

P.S. If I sound bitter because of's because I am...

Quote of the Day

Well at least I wouldn't had to suck your boyfriend's cock! -- Laura Dern as Ruth Stoops in Citizen Ruth

Thursday, May 20, 2004

Quote of the Day (a little late)

All we are called upon to do is not spend our nation into bankruptcy while our soldiers risk their lives. I fondly remember a time when real Republicans stood for fiscal responsibility. Apparently those days are long gone for some in our party. -- Senator John McCain

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Day Three of Gay Marriage....

...and to keep on Crash's theme, not only have statues of Jesus not started crying blood or demons risen from the earth to feed off the blood of Christian babies in Boston, but buildings haven't been shook from their foundations, Diet Coke still tastes the same, and straight people haven't run to the court houses en masse to get divorced because their marriages have been damaged by gay people getting married.

And to top it all off, the Stay-Puf Marshmallow Man hasn't turned up either...

Conversation of the Day

Rey Curtis: You ever pay for it, Lennie?

Lennie Briscoe: I was married, wasn't I?

-- from Law and Order in honor of Jerry Orbach's last episode

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Summer Reading List

Taken from Crash, this is the College Board list of books you should have read by college with the ones I have read in bold...of course if I actually remembered anything from most of them that would be impressive....there's a few I may revisit later this's also too shocking that Valley of the Dolls isn't on here either....


Achebe, Chinua - Things Fall Apart

Agee, James - A Death in the Family

Austen, Jane - Pride and Prejudice

Baldwin, James - Go Tell It on the Mountain

Beckett, Samuel - Waiting for Godot

Bellow, Saul - The Adventures of Augie March

Brontë, Charlotte - Jane Eyre

Brontë, Emily - Wuthering Heights

Camus, Albert - The Stranger

Cather, Willa - Death Comes for the Archbishop

Chaucer, Geoffrey - The Canterbury Tales

Chekhov, Anton - The Cherry Orchard

Chopin, Kate - The Awakening -- There's a great passage from this I want read when I finally get hitched

Conrad, Joseph - Heart of Darkness

Cooper, James Fenimore - The Last of the Mohicans

Crane, Stephen - The Red Badge of Courage

Dante - Inferno

de Cervantes, Miguel - Don Quixote

Defoe, Daniel - Robinson Crusoe

Dickens, Charles - A Tale of Two Cities

Dostoyevsky, Fyodor - Crime and Punishment

Douglass, Frederick - Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass

Dreiser, Theodore - An American Tragedy

Dumas, Alexandre - The Three Musketeers

Eliot, George - The Mill on the Floss

Ellison, Ralph - Invisible Man

Emerson, Ralph Waldo - Selected Essays

Faulkner, William - As I Lay Dying

Faulkner, William - The Sound and the Fury

Fielding, Henry - Tom Jones

Fitzgerald, F. Scott - The Great Gatsby

Flaubert, Gustave - Madame Bovary

Ford, Ford Madox - The Good Soldier

Goethe, Johann Wolfgang von - Faust

Golding, William - Lord of the Flies

Hardy, Thomas - Tess of the d'Urbervilles

Hawthorne, Nathaniel - The Scarlet Letter

Heller, Joseph - Catch 22

Hemingway, Ernest - A Farewell to Arms

Homer - The Iliad

Homer - The Odyssey

Hugo, Victor - The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Hurston, Zora Neale - Their Eyes Were Watching God

Huxley, Aldous - Brave New World

Ibsen, Henrik - A Doll's House

James, Henry - The Portrait of a Lady

James, Henry - The Turn of the Screw

Joyce, James - A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

Kafka, Franz - The Metamorphosis

Kingston, Maxine Hong - The Woman Warrior

Lee, Harper - To Kill a Mockingbird

Lewis, Sinclair - Babbitt

London, Jack - The Call of the Wild

Mann, Thomas - The Magic Mountain

Marquez, Gabriel García - One Hundred Years of Solitude -- In Spanish no less.....

Melville, Herman - Bartleby the Scrivener

Melville, Herman - Moby Dick

Miller, Arthur - The Crucible

Morrison, Toni - Beloved

O'Connor, Flannery - A Good Man is Hard to Find

O'Neill, Eugene - Long Day's Journey into Night

Orwell, George - Animal Farm

Pasternak, Boris - Doctor Zhivago

Plath, Sylvia - The Bell Jar

Poe, Edgar Allan - Selected Tales

Proust, Marcel - Swann's Way

Pynchon, Thomas - The Crying of Lot 49

Remarque, Erich Maria - All Quiet on the Western Front

Rostand, Edmond - Cyrano de Bergerac

Roth, Henry - Call It Sleep

Salinger, J.D. - The Catcher in the Rye

Shakespeare, William - Hamlet

Shakespeare, William - Macbeth

Shakespeare, William - A Midsummer Night's Dream

Shakespeare, William - Romeo and Juliet

Shaw, George Bernard - Pygmalion

Shelley, Mary - Frankenstein

Silko, Leslie Marmon - Ceremony

Solzhenitsyn, Alexander - One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich

Sophocles - Antigone

Sophocles - Oedipus Rex

Steinbeck, John - The Grapes of Wrath

Stevenson, Robert Louis - Treasure Island

Stowe, Harriet Beecher - Uncle Tom's Cabin

Swift, Jonathan - Gulliver's Travels

Thackeray, William - Vanity Fair

Thoreau, Henry David - Walden

Tolstoy, Leo - War and Peace

Turgenev, Ivan - Fathers and Sons

Twain, Mark - The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

Voltaire - Candide

Vonnegut, Kurt Jr. - Slaughterhouse-Five

Walker, Alice - The Color Purple

Wharton, Edith - The House of Mirth

Welty, Eudora - Collected Stories

Whitman, Walt - Leaves of Grass

Wilde, Oscar - The Picture of Dorian Gray

Williams, Tennessee - The Glass Menagerie

Woolf, Virginia - To the Lighthouse

Wright, Richard - Native Sons

Quote of the Day

The sacred institution of marriage should not be redefined by a few activist judges. All Americans have a right to be heard in this debate. -- President George Bush

Monday, May 17, 2004

Quote of the Day

To have the highest court in the state affirm your right to be a family was wonderful, and it just gave you courage. -- Marcia Hams, one half of the first same-sex couple to be issued a marriage license in the state of Massachusetts

Friday, May 14, 2004

Happy Blog-iversary!

So today is the second birthday of the blog so I thought I would do something pretty and spruce up the blog just a bit. New new content...

Woo hoo...

Maybe later today I'll revist the "best of" TOTC...
Quote of the Day

It's all a big CBS ploy to give Rupert a million dollars. It's rather sad, I think. -- Yours truly before last night's Survivor show

Thursday, May 13, 2004

I have gone two days without catching a single mouse.

This makes me happy.

I think the infestation is over.
Quote of the Day

Working with Barbra Streisand is pretty stressful. It's like sitting down to a picnic in the middle of a freeway. -- Kris Kristofferson

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

Quote of the Day

You sound like Brenda Vacarro. -- My boss in reference to my new throaty voice courtesy of whatever cold bug is going around.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

Okay, I am too bogged down at work to really think about posting about my latest rat killings (the glue traps...the WONDERFUL glue traps...snagged another one this morning bringing my death toll to a total of seven rats killed and I'm sure more to go) so I offer the following....

I'll start off the mythical story below with a sentence then you leave the next line (or lines as the case may be) in the comments section...

It was a dark and stormy night. Vin Diesel and I had just finished our ninth hour of headboard banging sex when the phone rang. I didn't want to answer it since we were about to start hour ten (even if we were taking a breather), but Vin needed to go to the bathroom and suggested that I answer it while he took care of his own business.

"Hello?" I said, with a slight bit of annoyance in my voice...

Pick it up from there....things that must somehow be incorporated into the story (which I would prefer to be a murder mystery by the way):

Debralee Scott
Daniel Cudmore
French clipped poodles
Mayan ruins
A leather harness wearing Republican senator in an S&M Club (I'll let you pick the senator)
Crash and Fish riding a Merry-Go-Round

and finally....

Vin Diesel pledging his eternal love to me

Quote of the Day

I'm not going to be like Donald Rumsfeld and be like, "Now what's that question supposed to mean?" -- Jamie Farr

Monday, May 10, 2004

So...remember killing that first rat last week.....

I've snagged SIX more since then and I've tracked them back to the apartment that I share a communal wall with since they all run back in that direction after leaving me...

Tonight, I snagged FOUR in less than THREE hours....

Great...just great....

I'm a rat killer....a big ass rat killer....

And no comments on the size of my ass thank you....

The (Late) Morning After....

....well maybe not so late...

Last night I went to the Survivor finale at Madison Square, got to boo Jerri off the stage and applaud as she left (stupid bitch that she is), got to express more disgust for Rupert who I still think is way too overrated as a person and is more or less a big child, then I got to go into the after party and have some fun where I told Sue Hawk what a sex bomb she was with her new figure....

And then I went home and crawled into bed after 2 in the morning and somehow found the energy to get up and come into the office today and try to get some work done...

Then I discovered all of the new Blogger templates and I'm like...hmm...maybe I need some sprucing up....

I dunno folks....after having to kill off three more rats in my place (I think they are coming from the apartment next to me since they all seem to be scurry in that direction and I saw at least two more in the apartment so I am going ot have to buy more of...of...well....something...I swear I hate the creatures...
Quote of the Day

You are a total fucking SEX BOMB! -- Yours truly to Sue Hawk at last night's Survivor party at Crobar

Friday, May 07, 2004

I killed my first rat this week.

Okay, let me clarify...I don't know if he's dead or not but I'm assuming that by now, he's toast.

For weeks I had seen this little grey blob dart across the floor...shockingly enough, the first rat I have EVER had in any apartment in NYC. Finally, I caught it darting behind the sink before it ran down behind the refrigerator and realized that it wasn't my eyes playing tricks on me but was a rat. A small one, but a rat nevertheless. I walked across the street to the D'Agostinos and found the rat glue traps and set them out. I was skeptical about their success but sure enough, the next morning I woke up and there was the offending creature caught up in the sticky, icky glue.

And it was still breathing.

For some reason I told myself that I couldn't bear to put him in the trash in that state because surely it might pop off somehow, chew through the bag, and then run off back to his base camp and I would come home to find my apartment covered in rats out to take their revenge on me.

So I went to work and rugby practice thinking that when I got home the rat would have died and I could just deposit him in the trash bag, take it downstairs, and be done with it.


Over twelve hours later and the thing was still breathing and still very much mired in the glue. I'm not sure if the brown flecks I saw in teh glue were rat feces or where it possibly had chewed off one of it's legs in a vain attempt to get free. I couldn't bear to let the creature go like that so I took the other rat trap I had laid out, placed it on top of the other, effectively making a glue trap sandwich, and put it in the trash, and took the bag downstairs.

The odd thing is though...I keep thinking about the rat and how he must have suffered. And I kinda hate myself for it...even if my apartment is now rat free.
Quote of the Day

We're done being stupid. Unless we're on a break. -- David Schwimmer as Ross on last night's finale of Friends.

Thursday, May 06, 2004

Note to self:


Do not wear those baggy boxers again when you go to the physical therapist's office. There's a reason why they draped a towel over your crotch.

Think about it.


Quote of the Day

This is why the French are hated so much. -- Anonymous

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

I don't know what to talk about today.

I could talk about some of the events at last night's practice.

But I won't.

I could talk about my sex life (because I actually do kinda have one).

But I won't.

I could talk about how much I hate the Republican Party.

But I won't.

I could talk about my whacked out grandmother who is seconds away from having "The Big One."

But I won't.

I could talk about how much apartment hunting sucks.

But I won't.


I dunno....just kinda not in the mood to talk.
Quote of the Day

When in Rome, do as the Romans; while in Washington, don't get caught. -- J.H. Goldfuss

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Quote of the Day

I haven't printed off SHIT yet! You just handed me the report three seconds ago! GIVE ME THE FUCKING CHANCE TO AT LEAST SEE WHAT I'M WORKING WITH BEFORE I START TO ACTUALLY WORK ON IT! -- Me to my boss about an hour ago.

And then we apologized to each other.

Monday, May 03, 2004

So tired.

So little sleep this weekend.

Anyway...the boys went to Philly this weekend and took on the Philadelphia Gryphons and won both of their matches. The first match start off a little hairy but the guys quickly got their footing and took it to the Gryphons hard and furious winning 27-7. They controlled the ball very well all match long and every little thing that they worked on at practice really and truly showed on the pitch. They worked hard and you could just see it all click in their minds what they had worked so hard on at practice and put into use at the match. Sure there were a few sloppy moment here and there but overall, wow...what a difference.

As for the B-match, they played their hearts out and won 10-0 with the ball in the Philly red zone for a nice chunk of the first match. They fought back and fought hard to keep Philly out of the try zone. It might not have been the previous of matches but the guys really got the job done when it mattered. One player (whom we call "Black Doug" as he is one of FOUR Doug's on the team) got his first try and performed the requisite zulu of running naked across the pitch as we all sang, "It's a Small World."

Sadly, due to commitments here in NYC I couldn't stay for the post-match drink up and rode back with one of the other players. We talked and really got to know each other during the ride back which was nice considering that he and I had never really spent major time together outside of practice or games. But what really got to me was that he was impressed with my transformation since I joined the team. Remember, when I joined, I wore glasses and was rather...well I'm still kinda heavy but I was a tank then. He thought I wouldn't last very long and has been pleasantly surprised that I've stuck with it and progressed for as long as I have...of course he also wants me to heal some more so I can play but that we shall see...lots of physical therapy ahead of me.

Fun times....

Now, if you really want to have fun, you'll join the team for a night at The Donkey Show too.....
Quote of the Day

It's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small, small world. -- Sung by the rugby team to our player as he performed his obligatory zulu at the end of the match.