Tuesday, November 05, 2002

I saw this on Court TV and it was pretty funny. Looks like the prosecution took a page out of David Letterman's book when doing their closing argument. Personally, I think the evidence shows that Winona Ryder, despite her protestations and excuses, really did shoplift and is guilty. I think her lawyer was full of crap.

'Top 10 list of things the law does not say'

(Court TV) — Presented by Deputy District Attorney Ann Rundle in her closing argument against Winona Ryder:

10. There is a higher standard of proof for celebrities

9. Two wrongs make a right

(a reference to mistakes or misstatements police may have made after Ryder was arrested)

8. If you sell $200 hair bows you deserve to get ripped off

(one of the items Ryder allegedly stole was a $214 Frederic Fekkai sequined hair bow)

7. If it's not in the first report, it didn't happen

(a security guard's claim that she saw Ryder cutting off security tags did not appear on the first police report)

6. Only defense attorneys can drive nice cars

(Ryder's defense claimed one guard had profited from selling the story of Ryder's arrest and was driving a new car)

5. The DA must call every person working at Saks that day

4. It's not stealing as long as you pay for some items

(Ryder had purchased some of the items in her possession that day)

3. Crime is OK if your director tells you to do it

(a security guard testified Ryder had admitted to shoplifting, but claimed she was rehearsing for a role)

2. No video, no crime

(the surveillance video did not actually show Ryder cutting off security tags and stuffing items in her bags)

1. Only poor people steal

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