So help me God...

....if anyone else calls me right as Desperate Housewives starts I swear I will hunt them down, tie them up, and force them to watch episodes of Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman followed by Cop Rock while simultaneously listening to an endless loop of Celine Dion doing nothing but her most overdramatic torch songs...

Call me at 10:01...I'll be available....


Congratulations! You are Gabrielle Solis, the
ex-model with everything she's every wanted a
rich husband, a big house and John, the
17-year-old gardener.


Which Desperate Housewife are you?
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Attention all backseat drivers...

SHUT THE HELL UP!!

inhale

exhale

Much better...

Quote of the Day

I'm just gonna tell you to go here for your quote of the day because 1) It's a damn good quote and 2) I was also there when it was said and 3) It's kinda true...

Scariest Halloween Costume of the Day (if not EVER!)

Come on...sing it with me...

She's fantastic...
Made of plastic...
Microchips here and there...
She's a small wonder...
Brings love and laughter everywhere...

As the Stomach Turns...

You know it's not going to be a good day when it starts off with the second guessing/armchair quarterback/backseat driver emails that questions a decision that they don't like and is filled with many suppositions that are patently false and insulting to those who have been working on the project.

All I'm going to say is that the guys at practice tonight had better watch out. I'm going to be hitting and hitting hard.

Crutch. Gone.

Thank God they won. Now when they suck or even choke in a playoff situation they can only blame themselves and not a decision made almost 90 years ago...

And while I'm at it....

Don't tell anyone but I'm secretly pulling for the Red Sox to win the World Series tonight for this sole reason:

When they start to suck next season (and the season after that and after that and after that)...Sox fans can no longer blame a stupid mythological curse for the fact that they SUCK...

The "curse" is a crutch for their disappointment...take it away and they will have to deal with their suckage (that is when they suck because let's face it...they're playing pretty well right now)...

Strokin' of another kind

Last night after rugby practice I was on the subway heading home with one of the guys on the team and we got to talking about the team and how we have raised funds this year. Of course, I brought up our near legendary bachelor auction and made the comment that he was going to be in it next year.

After hearing his pleas that he wouldn't go for anything (something I've heard two years in a row and shoot down each time), I shot back with, "Hey, $100 is a $100. Hey, I went for $350 this year."

"And you were underpriced," he said.

It was just one of those moments after the really shitty day I had where my ego was stroked just enough that it actually changed how I perceived my day -- not as shitty as before and ending on a rather nice note.

Underpriced. I can live with that...

P.S. If such person that I rode with last night happens to be reading this since I did give you the URL...well...Hi!!! And now I blush...and of course you had better tell me if you read this... :)

Quote of the Day

I don't know when you think you were crowned queen of the whole damn world but I know Bert Parks hasn't put a crown on your head and start singing "There She Is" recently... -- Yours truly to one of my psychotic coworkers during a "Come to Jesus" meeting...

Adventures in Physical Therapy

Where I go to get my PT isn't a large office but it's enough to where you can still get that personal attention and get worked over well.

The only complaint that I would have is that it does not have a locker room or changing rooms for clients to use (especially if you've worked up a sweat during PT). You find one of the small rooms in the back with a table where they do evaluations, apply heat, give you electronic stimulation, etc. and change in one of them. It's never really been a problem, but there are many times when there are two people sharing a room for changing purposes.

Today it became a small problem. I had just gotten done with the ultrasound and massage work on my foot with the bad case of plantar fasciitis and made my next appointment when I headed back to my room to retrieve my clothes. Now, I was careful in folding my clothes so they didn't take up too much room, was out of the way, blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda.

I just wish the woman who came in after me had been as considerate. I reached down nder the table where I had stowed my clothes and the first thing I felt was how wet my clothes were.

Now this was a problem. My khaki pants (which I had placed on the floor with my shirt and shoes on top) had a lovely streak of brown liquid right across the ass of the pants so it looked like I had a bad case of diarrhea and didn't make it to the toilet in time. I looked under the table and sitting next this purse at the foot of the table was a still warm cup of coffee that had tipped over spilling its lovely caffinated goodness all over my pants.

I put my rugby shorts back on and walked out to the counter where I asked who else was using the room because I wanted them to know what they had done. The receptionist called out to the only other woman in the entire room outside of the therapists and asked her what room she put her purse. It was in fact my room although she tried to deny the fact that she brought in a cup of coffee with her until the lovely front desk woman said she remembered her having it in her hand when she signed in.

She refused to believe that her coffee cup had tipped over and that I deliberately poured it on my pants. I told her that if she didn't pony up money so I could go get a new pair of pants I was going to go into her purse myself and get the money and/or credit card myself because I had far better things to do with my time than "pour coffee on my own pants so it would look like I shit myself."

Finally, the manager of the entire office had to get involved and told her that she's responsible for what she brings into the office and she should pay me for a new set of pants. It took about another fifteen minutes but finally she took her credit card and ID (because the office manager was holding her purse hostage) and went to the Generic Apparel Place (aka G.A.P.) and got me a replacement pair of pants.

In the wrong size.

But at least they are pants. And I don't look like I shit my pants.

The woman stormed out after coming back with the pants and said she would find a new therapist because she had never "been treated this way in all [her] life" and she would give her "business" (something that made me snicker) to a more "reputable" establishment. I was kinda waiting for her to say that she would call the firm president and have them all fired by the end of the day but I think that was a little too Joan Collins-y for her.

The manager...totally nonplused over the whole thing.

Round 2 is Over

Suitman and I talked last night.

He now wants to be friends. We didn't get the full in depth talk that we're going to be having but for now we're friends.

Of course, remember that I did say that about not that long ago about the two of us and it rekindled yet again.

Part of me giggles a little and part of me is scratching my head.

And part of me wonders if it really is all over...

Quote of the Day

Men and me are like pianos. When they get upright, I feel grand. -- From the musical Steel Pier.

Beware of the Lemon

Ahh....the weekend. Not enough sleep and way too much fun.

Saturday is, of course, a rugby day (at least until the middle of November) and this one was no exception as we took on the Bull Moose RFC one more time this year in the play off rounds. Granted we weren't in the semifinal rounds where we wanted to be, but we we came out hard and played great with a quick early score and took at 23-17 win (despite the original score being quoted as 23-12 it was in fact 23-17...I think the ref missed a try).

The drink up was its normal rowdy event as it normally is with the Bull Moose. Of their guys they have nicknamed Caesar (and is a nice specimen of the male species I can assure you) made a crack at how he passed by our team's bus after our first match with them earlier this year and no one pretty much paid him any attention (probably because we were so drunk). Of course you have to remember that this is the guy where when we first played them was opposite me in the scrum. I was so freakin' smitten that when he smiled at me right before the ref called engage that I lost concentration for a second and barely got my head in the right position. He shouldn't worry though...we showed him plenty of love this past Saturday. :)

At the last drink up and again with this one, the dreaded lemon made its appearance. If a lemon (or with some teams, a golf ball) gets deposited in your beer you have to chug the entire cup. If you try to put the lemon in someone's beer and miss then you have to chug the entire cup. It's one of those games that starts off fun and then gets annoying kinda quickly. There is a certain amount of stealth involved in the game too as most people spend the drink up with their hand over the mouth of their cup to prevent such an action. To show how dastardly of a plot it can be, one person actually put the lemon in the pitcher of beer that someone was holding and he had to drink the two-thirds full pitcher.

Since I don't really drink beer (very rarely), my participation in this game is minimal because if you're going to put a lemon in my Diet Coke then it's really not worth it. Well, I got the lemon because I had a dead on bead on someone's unprotected cup of beer. I was doing the patented "reach around" move when his arm brushed mine and the lemon missed his cup by about a quarter of an inch.

I had to chug.

And then I felt ill. Violently ill. Thankfully it passed quickly otherwise it could have been very bad. And it also proved why I would never be a good boat race participant.

The only other person who had to chug a large quantity all at once was Dennis who was doing his infamous "Duck Song" and screwed up the lyrics. With cries of "Shoot the boot" going on people were clammoring for him to be handed someone's boot (aka rugby cleat) to drink from...as none were forthcoming, I pulled off my size 13 (and no I'm not lying when I say that) workman's boot and handed it to the beer master who poured him one smelly drink and we sat there and watched as he tried in vain to drink it all down. He didn't get it all and my boot still smells like beer but it was one of those moments where size really did matter and I was glad I could help out...

This week...blech....work work work...my job is never done...

Quote of the Day

Susan had met the enemy. And she was a slut. -- From my new Sunday night addiction, Desperate Housewives

Quote of the Day

Whenever a theory appears to you as the only possible one, take this as a sign that you have neither understood the theory nor the problem which it was intended to solve. -- Karl Popper

6.95 Miles?

65 minutes.

1,204 calories.

And, yes, 6.95 miles on the elliptical runner.

Now someone tell my why my knees feel like crap...

Quote of the Day

You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do. -- Olin Miler

Some apologies

It's rare that I delete a post.

It's rare that I actually write something I wouldn't want people to read or am not fully aware of how it could be perceived.

For those of you that emailed me, I'm sorry I caused you unnecessary worry but, at the same time, I'm glad to know that you are there for me should something like this ever happen again. The last few days have been incredibly stressful in multiple ways and I don't think I'm dealing with it as well as I could and, to some extent, am compromising the person that I would like to think that I am. Or, maybe I'm learning who the real me is and it's not what I like.

Anyway, the House of the 646Guy is up for some major renovations. At the very least it needs a good dusting.

Quote of the Day

A government that is big enough to give you all you want is big enough to take it all away. -- Barry Goldwater

Why? (amended)

This post was deleted. I don't want to talk about it.

Quote of the Day

You have a responsibility to the public discourse, and you fail miserably. -- Jon Stewart on CNN's Crossfire to their two hosts.

BBC America's "The Office" Quote of the Day

Those of you who think you know everything are annoying to those of us who do. -- Ricky Gervais as David Brent on BBC America's THE OFFICE

Diagnosis

According to the our team's trainer, I did not tear my ACL but rather I decided to go for the combo plate special....

I pulled BOTH my ACL and MCLs with that lovely, ever so dramatic, not the least bit graceful fall Thursday night at practice.

If anything, it means that my figure skating career is really over for once and for all now...

Maybe....maybe not...

Last night during warm-ups at rugby practice, I took a HARD fall while doing a side lateral run. Hard is an understatement. I hit and I think I bounced too...

(For the record, I'm not sure what caused me to fall exactly whether it was a rock or I just wasn't getting my feet up high enough or whatever because it all happened so fast...)

Anyway, I hit and I grabbed my knee because it hurt like fucking hell. The coaches thought I had hit a rock when I landed and that wass why I was in so much pain. The only problem was that I couldn't straighten out my left leg without immense pain. Ultimately I was able to do that after a lot of deep breaths and slowly lowering my leg. One of the guys on the team who is a doctor checked me out and said that my ACL was unstable which isn't exactly what you want to hear. There was the chance that I had ripped my ACL.

Now this is what I learned...if you rip your ACL you can still walk forward normally. It's the side-to-side motion that is impaired the most. So here was I walking along pretty well and thinking everything is pretty cool when I could be doing even worse for myself overall. I was told that I would know pretty much later that night or the next morning depending on the pain. As the night wore on the pain morphed into this dull burn on the back of the knee and then back into a dull pain. This morning, my leg was pretty stiff and even now the dull ache behind the knee is still there and I'm wondering what I've really done, if anything.

I haven't tried any major side-to-side movements today to check it out and, frankly, my mother isn't too happy with the new developments either noted by the long sigh when I told her. With tomorrow as the last match of the regular season, I really want to finish out the season whether it kills me or not...of course, if it does kill me that wouldn't really be a good thing...surgery though would be a bad thing too but if it fixes the problem that would be a good thing...

Rugby Practice Conversation of the Day

Coach B: (to 646Guy) Hello, Mr. Torn ACL. Being a martyr on the cross for us again?

646Guy: Hey, I made that damn cross!

Coach B: Yeah, in home ec class.

646Guy: Damn right! I spent three weeks crocheting it!

-- conversation as we started a lineout drill about twenty minutes after I took a particular nasty fall during warm-ups and, yes, I may have torn my ACL but we'll see...

Blech...

I'm tired.

I'm sore.

I'm running a slight fever.

I'm a little achy but not bad.

I'm not sleeping as well as I used to...and that's with the Ambien.

I'm trying to stay well in order to play in the final match of the regular season tomorrow.

I'm trying to keep my sanity.

I'm not winning that battle very well.

Quote of the Day

There's more to having a winning season than the number in the "W" column and I just wish he would acknowledge that. -- Yours truly trying to squelch internal drama

More Reality TV and Me

Remember when I admitted I almost made it on a reality TV show on FOX?

Well I saw the commercial for the show and it made me breathe a HUGE sigh of relief.

Have you seen the commercials for My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss? Yes, folks, if you can believe it, that was the show that I almost made it on. Oddly enough, one of the guys on the rugby team works for Fox and when I mentioned how far along I had made it in the process he was aghast. (And yes, aghast, while a dramatic word is also very apt for his reaction.)

When I started going over the entire process I went through with him, he was just nodding his head as if to say, "Oh yeah, I know what you're talking about." He said what most likely did me in was the fact that I write (wrote?) for a reality TV website and that when they do the background checks on people they do "Google" people to see what they have online if anything. If anything did me in, it was that.

It does kinda make me laugh though because from the commercial I saw there is no way in hell that I would have bought that as a legitimate show/premise/whatever. I would have been like that chick on the second Joe Schmo Show who saw through the entire facade because there is only so much that you can get away with before people really start to wonder what the hell is going on. So, instead of thinking that I didn't get on the show because of my reality TV connections, I'm just gonna say I didn't get on the show because I was just too damn smart...

Quote of the Day

My darling girl, when are you going to understand that "normal" isn't a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage. -- Stockard Channing as Frances Owens in the movie "Practical Magic"

The Long Walk Home

Last night I was walking home from the subway after a rugby meeting when this guy started walking by, looked at me, and then just started talking about how he's walked from some long far off distance, blah, blah, blah. It was late, I wasn't really in the mood to carry on a conversation with a total stranger.

Except for him it wasn't a conversation. He was hitting on me. He said he knew I was gay from the way that I walked. Now, I've never really noticed whether or not my walk qualifies as "gay" or even "gay like" but well...I dunno where I'm going with that one. Anyway, he was clearly trying to hook up with me and 1) I wasn't interested and 2) I just wanted to get home because I had physical therapy at 7:30 this morning so I really needed some sleep (and I wound up oversleeping too). So...well...I kinda lied. I said I was already spoken for which didn't make him too happy and sent him off on a rant on this incredibly effeminate Puerto Rican/Italian guy he likes and ended with him asking if my "guy" and I lived together. Again, I lied and said yes. I think he was hoping that we didn't so we could have sex or something but it wasn't going to happen.

Okay, if he had asked me about whatever guy I was with I would have pulled out either SkiGuy or SuitMan and talked about him. Thankfully it never came to that but when he started telling me about how he had just come from a Sexual Compulsives Anonymous meeting (and getting the general vibe that he wanted to hook up) I'm kinda glad that I made up the lie.

I mean I guess I'm flattered and all but it's just left me a wee bit confused.

I do know that I'm going to be on the look out for this guy the next time I get off of the L Train. I don't need this drama.

Political Quote of the Day

As people do better, they start voting like Republicans...unless they have too much education and vote Democratic, which proves there can be too much of a good thing. -- Bush advisor Karl Rove

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I've slept for most of yesterday and today. I guess I'm trying to make up for all that I missed the past week.

Didn't spend time with either SkiGuy (heading off to DC to spend time with family) or SuitMan (spending time with his father before he headed back to Colombia) which was actually kinda nice. SuitMan and I did have a nice talk on Sunday and we're going to try to get together this coming week and do something. Not really sure where it's heading with either guy but we shall see...

This weekend I played in the B side match against Lansdowne. I definitely didn't think I played as well or as intense as I did against Suffolk the week before but I did get named the Man of the Match for the forwards which I equated to being one big "hot box of crazy." There's one match left and that's against Hudson Valley and will determine where we play in the playoff rounds the following week. We're either going to be fourth or fifth which means if we're placed fourth we're heading off to Montauk again (most likely). If we finish fifth then we're most likely hosting Suffolk which of course would be a lot of fun.

Nothing new. Kinda uninspired. We'll talk later.

Quote of the Day

I've never seen garbage eat garbage before. -- Christopher Reeve, as Clark Kent, in Superman II. Christopher Reeve died Sunday of heart failure.

Divider Not a Uniter

No...I didn't get the quote wrong. I know Bush said he was a "uniter not a divider" but when you look at what has happened to the local paper in Crawford, Texas it really makes you wonder how true of a statement that really is...

For the record, the Crawford, Texas, newspaper endorsed John Kerry for President citing issues in the president's performance over the past four years. They were alternately praised and ridiculed for doing so receiving some emails that even made me shudder because they were just...well...let's just say it didn't put them in a good position. Some people cancelled subscriptions and some advertisers pulled their spots as well. To counteract that, people have been writing in and buying subscriptions (including me) to support them in this time...

Personally, I can never remember a moment in my lifetime when our country was so politically polarized between the parties. And, frankly, I don't see it getting any better anytime soon...

Quote of the Day

I hope I don’t give you indigestion. -- Minnie Driver to an audience before performing songs from her new CD

Drama Sheild UP!

Block overly dramatic email #1!

Phasers on overly dramatic email #2!

Carefully evade overly dramatic email #3!

Laser beams destroy overly dramatic #4!

Use Vulcan cloaking devide to pass by overly dramatic email #5 unnoticed!

Uncloak.

Drama shield down.

This battle is over.

Boring day at the office

I've spent the entire day playing nothing but games at the office today.

And for this they pay me a full salary.

I would say that this is a dream job but I'm actually rather bored.

Quote of the Day

If celebrities didn't want people pawing through their garbage and saying they're gay, they shouldn't have tried to express themselves creatively. -- Homer Simpson

Debating the debates

"So...what did you think about the debates last night?"

That's what I heard this morning and last Friday following the first two debates of this campaign season. My answer: I didn't watch them. I had rugby practice. And, to be honest, even if I was home, I don't know if I would watch them.

I know how I'm voting. I've known for quite some time. I don't need to watch the debates as it's not going to change my mind. Would I watch the next one just so I can see Bush fumble some more and look like he's constipated? Absolutely. I swear, the clips I saw of the first debate made it look like George Bush was trying to push out the biggest load of shit from his ass and instead we saw it coming out of his mouth instead.

Town hall debates are fun though. I might watch this next one since you never know when some commie liberal pinkos will claim to be undecided and sneak in so they can slam Dubya with a question he can't answer...

Really Bad Pillow Talk of the Day

The night before, we’re like, ‘When we wake up we’re going to have coffee, it’s going to be great. I’m going to use the yellow cup.’” -- Sarah Jessica Parker telling World Entertainment News that she and hubby Matthew Broderick like to talk about coffee while in bed.

This Is Now a "No Drama Zone"

So someone "stepped on your toes" on a project? GET THE FUCK OVER IT...did you read the email where the phrase "investigating" was used and not the phrase "doing it" or are you just that dumb?

So you think your entire office is out to get you and you turn everything into one of your persecution complexes? GET THE FUCK OVER IT...no one really gives a flying fuck about your ass and we've all pretty much learned that we don't need you in the office anyway since you do such little work as it is.

So you're a little upset because I didn't know that you also happened to know the same people that I asked someone else to to get some information from? GET THE FUCK OVER IT...if I could read your mind and your internal rolodex then this wouldn't be a problem but God didn't grant me those powers when I was born so you're just going to have to accept that fact.

So your job has you down and you want to do nothing more than talk to me about bad you're treated and how much you can't stand the people you work with? GET THE FUCK OVER IT...if you aren't looking for a new job then stop talking about how much you hate yours. I'm not the fucking Human Resources department nor am I Monster.com.

So things just aren't going your way and you think that I'm supposed to give a rat's ass because you've decided to wallow in your world rather than try to fix it? GET THE FUCK OVER IT...if you're not trying to find your way out of the plastic bag then you can just suffocate on it because I don't want to hear about it any more.

I am reclaiming my world and setting up a NO DRAMA ZONE.

Got a problem? That's nice. Unless you're trying to fix it and not just coming to me to bitch about it then shut the fuck up. I don't need to get involved. I don't want to get involved.

I love you all. Trust me, I do. But there comes a time when you need to reclaim your space even if it's just for a day.

And I'm doing it.

It's mine.

Drama. Be gone.

Quote of the Day

Anything is art if the artist says it is. -- Marcel Duchamp

Saturday (and Sunday) and SkiGuy

After the match on Saturday, I went to Therapy (the bar not the actual psychological session) and had a late dinner and drinks with many jokes made about enjoying the jalepeno poppers (or as we just referred to them "poppers" which garnered us many looks..."Wow, I just love those poppers you got!")...later his friend James joined us after taking in a performance of Chicago at the Ambassador Theatre

For the most part, I feel lucky that I was actually still awake because I was beginning to fade pretty fast but for some reason I decided that I would join SkiGuy back at his place so we could partake of the season premiere of Saturday Night Live and spend a little more time together. Frankly, I didn't think the season opener was all that great and I was waiting for Weekend Update because I'm a real whore for Tina Fey. SkiGuy and I curled up on his somewhat uncomfortable couch, watched SNL, and made out...

Around 1:00 in the morning, we were both kinda beat and he turned to me and said..."So...it's late...um...do you want to head home or..." and he kinda trailed off not finishing his sentence but letting me know that it was okay that if I wanted to spend the night with him I could. Of course the fact that he did want to invite me up to his place the night before didn't escape my mind either.

"To be honest," I started off slowly, "I'd rather not..."

With that we adjourned to his bedroom where he gave me a t-shirt to sleep in along with my boxers and we curled up in bed, kissed some more, kinda groped each other some, kissed a bit more, and finally bedded down for the night (which invariably had a few kissing sessions in it as well). No sex, but a lot of cuddling which was rather nice. Early the in the morning when I had to get up to go to the bathroom, I came back to the bed to find that he had "stolen" my pillow and was cuddling up with that rather than with me...

Finally we got up around 10:30 or so, took a shower and headed out to have brunch. SkiGuy picked up his favorite Sunday mock reading, the New York Post, while I found a Learning Annex brochure and I always get a kick out of some of the "seminars" they offer from "Make Your Own Home Adult Movie!" to "Make Your Own Natural Perfume" to, my personal favorite, the seminar entitled "Learn How to Make $10,000 Giving Seminars!" I, of course, think Step One for that is, "Associate yourself with the Learning Annex to gyp people out of money!"

After brunch, it was after noon and I really needed to get home and take care of some things there so I hailed a cab (the first one having no idea how to get to Greenpoint so thankfully I disembarked before he took off) and headed home where I really got nothing done but more sleep to make up for what I missed out on when I was in bed with SkiGuy. Is it just me or is it hard to actually sleep in the same bed with someone the first time because you're trying to get used to someone else in the bed to begin with and how they prefer to sleep, etc etc...maybe it's just me...

Conversation of the Day

646Guy: Well as one of our coaches said last week, "Danbury spent twenty minutes in shock because they realized the faggots learned how to play rugby."

Suffolk player: To be honest, I pretty much said the same thing after you scored that first try.

15 - 6

Gotham Knights RFC - 15
Bull Moose RFC - 6

Our first win ever over a union opponent and it was a tough played, very intense match. While Bull Moose might not be happy to be the first team to lose to us, their players were highly complimentary and amazed at our growth as a team (in size and experience) and...well...I'm pretty freakin' happy...

Um.....

.....SkiGuy mystery solved...kinda...more later....

Okay here's a hint in the form of a late night Quote of the Day kinda way....

Well...if you didn't have a rugby match tomorrow I would invite you up tonight. -- SkiGuy after a very long kiss while standing on the corner of 37th and 8th...

More later...I promise...

Yes....he called me...

Wednesday night I had a talk online with this guy this guy about the men in my dating world and how I kinda knew how SuitMan feels but how stumped I was about SkiGuy. The conversation ended with the two of us agreeing that at some point I was going to have to be a little blunt and ask...

So last night I was on the Magic Bus (aka the Methadone Express) to rugby practice when my cell phone went off...I looked down to see who was calling and saw that it was SkiGuy.

Now this really wouldn't be that much of a big deal except for the fact that he just got home from Toronto yesterday and was supposed to be heading out to D.C. today to spend the weekend with his family. Please note the use of the word "supposed."

He's not going to D.C. after all. He called because he wants to get together and do something this weekend.

I think I have a better idea now. Not a great idea but a better idea.

Quote of the Day

He called me
A guy that I am dating really called me
Thank God I got call waiting
'cause he called me...

-- from "He Called Me" from the off-Broadway musical I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change