This morning I got a phone call from my sister letting me know that my paternal grandmother had passed away in her sleep this morning.
My reaction to the news has left me very conflicted. I wasn't as close to this grandmother as I was to my maternal grandmother. I found my paternal grandmother to be emotionally manipulative of the family. She always had something to complain about and would pit family members against each other in order to get her way or gain sympathy. Thankfully I was smart enough to wise up to the act rather early and not give in to the emotional blackmail. I was her grandson so I did care about her and love her, but her actions made it very difficult sometimes.
I am going to the funeral this week and plans are being made for that as we speak. We're not sure when it's going to be but Saturday is a good bet. I'm sure this will all hit me later and I'll probably show a bit more emotion or feeling then. Part of me is reflecting over the summers that my sister and I spent with her in South Carolina and trying remember her as I saw her when I was young rather than the way I remember her now as an adult and the way she treated me and, especially, my mother.
I'll figure it all out somehow and will reconcile it all the best I can.
1 comment:
Hi Brian,
I finally figured out how to add you to my LJ feed... and just wanted to say that so sorry about the loss of your grandmother. I knew it's been a long while since seeing how you've been doing/or checking out the HoE list... but just wanted to say that you and your family are in my thoughts.
Take care and hope that your family finds comfort and support with each other and with friends to heal from the loss of your grandmother.
*hugs* from R.
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