How to definitively turn a straight man gay (claiming no ownership or rights to the article below)...

LONDON, Oct. 20 (UPI) -- A London company has gone to the government to complain about the size and age of a stripper they booked for a party, the London Sun said Monday.

The problem began when B and G Cleaning Systems decided to surprise service manager Steve Pantony with an office "strip-o-gram" for his 40th birthday. After searching the Internet, they settled on the Beechline agency and requested a "slim attractive girl" to appear and strip at a phony business meeting for $150. Instead, a 250-pound middle-aged woman named Toni appeared dressed as a policewoman. She ended her 20 minute show by baring her breasts and spanking Pantony.

"It's put me off women for life. I've been getting flashbacks ever since," Pantony said.

The group was so incensed they contacted lawyers, who believe they have a case of "misrepresentation" under the Supply of Goods and Services Act of 1982.