Today at lunch I opted for the Chipolte Chicken Chili...of course that means I also opted for a fierce case of gas as it turned out.
Nothing I have taken has helped to alleviate was my sister once referred to as "vaporous exceretions."
So there I was on the subway trying to hold in a doozy of internal combustion when I decided that I would manuever myself to the door and let it fly onto the platform and not stink up the car. I tried to time it so it would let loose as the doors closed.
I'm timing and timing and timing and when I hear the ding that the door is going to close, I let it rip.
At that exact same moment an Upper East Side/Park Avenue rich bitch forces her way onto the car as the doors start to close.
And I farted all over her.
For the record this is my first ever post about farts but I just had to share.
Sent wirelessly via BlackBerry from T-Mobile.